LBS Looks Strong Against Hookers
#8 Gremlins 2, #9 Denim Demons 1 (OT-SO)
Gremlins: Rod Sherwood
Denim Demons: Adam “Legend Killer” Rubens
Goalie Win: Jamie Batuwantudawe
Shootout: Gremlins win shootout 2-1.
#1 Filthier 5, #19 Tompkins Square Riots 0
Filthier: Denis Miciletto 3, Sunny Mehra, Shafiq Perry
Shutout: Tim Kayiatos
#5 Sky Fighters 1, #12 Gut Rot 0
Sky Fighters: Mike Teytelbaum
Shutout: James Stein
#4 LBS, Inc. 4, #13 Corlears Hookers 2
LBS, Inc.: Scott Kaston 3, Tommy Capatosta
Corlears Hookers: Danilo Biagioni, Sarah Newnam
Goalie Win: Tim “Gunz” Brown
#3 Rehabs 3, #16 Instant Karma 0
Rehabs: Rob B. 2, Ramy Odeh
#6 Mathematics 2, #11 Butchers 0
Mathematics: Nathan Norris, Sam Norris
Shutout: David Liang
#7 Gouging Anklebiters 4, #10 Cobra Kai 3 (OT-SO)
Gouging Anklebiters: Ben Probert 2, Charles DeFranco
Cobra Kai: Doug Bova, Dan Innamorato, Liam Martens
Goalie Win: Craig LaCombe
Shootout: Biters win 1-0.
#2 Fresh Kills 2, #18 Dark Rainbows 1
Fresh Kills: Gabe Chenard 2
Dark Rainbows: Rachel Klion
Goalie Win: Patrick Barch
Let The Tournament Begin!
Editor’s Note: The following was written by everyone’s favorite Denim Demon (which isn’t saying much), Jennifer Popack. Although we at The ORG helped with her with some of the spreads to ensure accuracy, you can attribute all uses of the first person to her.
Because my football team and I broke up, I needed to fill a void, and the best solution is to become a complete degenerate and gamble on BTSH playoff games…which I’m now going to share with all of you! You were obviously going to stick around and watch all the games on Sunday anyway, but now you have an even better reason to heckle teams and give a crap.
Here are the rules: we will generate a spread for each of the games throughout the playoffs. You have to make your selections each week in the attached excel grid and email it to me by Saturday afternoon. The person with the highest number of correct picks at the end of the playoffs will be the winner. If there’s a tie, the tiebreak will be your guess of total number of goals scored throughout the playoffs (closest total will win). It’s just $5 to play, and the size of the pot will depend on how many people decide to join – so spread the word!! (Venmo, PayPal, and cold hard cash are all acceptable forms of payment – jpopack <at> gmail)
Without further ado, here are this week’s spreads (playoff seed in parentheses):
What an opening round: 3 out of 4 upsets this week, and all 3 of them were shutouts. Amazing. A big part of me wanted to give all 3 stars to the 3 goaltenders who had shutouts, but I decided that might be a little too obvious a route.
It wasn’t easy this week, but here we go…..
3rd star: Peter Wilson – Instant Karma
A longtime skilled player in the league, Pete scored 2 out of his team’s 3 goals in their first ever playoff game Sunday, including the game winner. This was a game everyone expected the Elves to win. (Karma were at such a loss for strategy going into the game that they were toying with the idea of using a Flying V formation. Or kidnapping Gil.) They did not end up having to do either of those things to get the win. Staunch defense, great goaltending and a stellar offensive game from Pete did the trick. Side note: I won’t mention Captain Chadwick missing the gimme empty net goal here…it’s already been talked about it enough.
2nd star: Bill Lin – Dark Rainbows
I don’t know this kid, but I’ve seen him play. His play is even more intense than the hemmorhoids Derek was telling me he had last week. (sorry, bro, was I not supposed to mention that to anybody?) The first time I was watching the Rainbows and saw Bill play I was like “who is that super intense kid???”. He plays every game like it’s Game 7 of the Stanley Cup. This kid does it all – he runs like a bat out of hell, he yells (mostly for the puck), he drops down to block shots (with zero gear). He makes his presence known. Love or hate Bill’s intense style of play – he gets the job done. A very skilled new addition to the Rainbows this year, Bill scored the lone goal in his team’s upset of Poutine Machine on Sunday, earning him this week’s 2nd star. After seeing his intensity in the opening round I don’t even know what to expect in the Round of 16. Fresh Kills may be in for a bit of a shock to the system…
1st star of the week: Dave Gil de Rubio – Tompkins Square Riots
Dave had a rough week leading up to this game – he and the Riots lost their last game 11-1, his father passed away and he just found out that his favorite show Beverly Hills 90210 was cancelled (Dave is a little behind on reading the news, apparently. Spoiler alert, Dave: Donna Martin DID, in fact, graduate). Despite all this adversity Dave was able to do his best Taylor Swift, and shake it off.
Remaining focused and determined Dave turned away EVERY shot from a potent WTP offense, logging the shutout and advancing his team to the Round of 16. While the Riots were an underdog in this matchup, you wouldn’t have known it by the way Dave and the rest of the squad played. I would have interviewed Dave about his impressive shutout, but I was too busy scrimmaging for 4 hours. Oops.
I imagine he would have said something humble and graceful, as always, though.
Perhaps something like this?
Congrats to one of the hardest working goalies in show business on an extremely well-deserved 1st star. It couldn’t have gone to a better guy.
K is for Karma
#18 Dark Rainbows 1, #15 Poutine Machine 0
Dark Rainbows: Bill Lin
Shutout: Kevin Longwell
#16 Instant Karma 3, #17 Happy Little Elves 0
Instant Karma: The Peter Wilson 2, Cory Vernoia
Shutout: Mike Maloney
#19 Tompkins Square Riots 3, #14 What The Puck 0
Tompkins Square Riots: Alex, Max Chanel, Joe Fiore
Shutout: Dave Gil de Rubio
#13 Corlears Hookers 7, #20 Mega Touch 2
Corlears Hookers: Gavin Kearney 3, Sarah Newnam 2, C.J. Anderson, Danilo Biagioni
Mega Touch: Brady Caldwell, Keegan Tupchong
Goalie Win: Amriel Kissner