by Anonymous Lovely Lady
Chief Design Officer Amy v Board Woman Georgine
Gouging Anklebiters at Butchers
We haven’t seen much of Amy yet this season, but we know her heart and creative mind is with the ‘biters every week. Amy always creates fabulous costume designs for the ‘biters new recruits, which we sadly missed seeing due the opening party being hosted on Saturday. There’s always next year!
Georgine is a constant surprise as she is always willing to take on roles within BTSH to make it a better place. Her chill attitude and ‘Who Cares?’ motto should be adopted by more teams.
Prediction: The Butchers can’t catch a break, 6-2 Anklebiters, but these teams will be seen sharing beers after.
Captain JoAnn v Captain Laura
Poutine Machine at Tompkins Square Riots
French Canadian Captain JoAnn has really reshaped Poutine over the last few seasons. Attitude and clean play has vastly improved for the team. Perhaps the friendly Canadian way is slowly settling over Poutine.
Biker chick MacNeil is always ready to lead her team on the court. Under her leadership, the Riots team takes the ‘don’t be a dick’ rule to heart on and off the court. The recruitment efforts during the off season may not have paid off yet, but there are still many games ahead.
Prediction: Poutine with extra gravy, 3-1 Poutine Machine.
Captain Emily v Captain Lauren
What the Puck at Cobra Kai
As of writing time, the Wild are down against Winnipeg which has kept Emily from focusing on her own upcoming game.
Better known as LJ, I think she’s been holding weekly team drills. The Dojo is in top form this season and we’re scared. All are welcome to join the team sprints they do after each game.
Prediction: Wild lose the series and 5-2 Cobra Kai.
Captain Julie v Captain Jenn
Mega Touch at Denim Demons
I believe there is holiday candy for 90% off at Duane Reade…
Your Secret Admirer
Tell Julie about a candy sale for your chance to win this Sunday.
Your Secret Admirer
BONUS PREVIEW – Straight Outta Tompkins
by Ice Capade
You are now about to witness the strength of street hockey knowledge.
Straight outta Tompkins, crazy MegaToucher named Alok
From the gang called Canucks At Artichoke
When he’s called in, he’s got an Easton
Takes a wrist shot and the goalie has a brain stroke
You too, boy, if ya mess with Mega Touch
They score a buncha goals then they’re off to get brunch
Off yo ass, that’s how they goin’ out
For the punk Denim Demons that are showin’ out
Demons start to mumble, they wanna rumble
Julie gonna solve ’em like a Junior Jumble
Goin’ off on a Demon like that
With the ball passed around by five guys named Zach
When Mega Touch gets their groove on?
They’ll be cuttin’ you out like a Burger King coupon
But here’s a player stat that’ll help you get through
Maybe sink a biscuit, maybe even two
Because goalie Tuckman? He don’t give a fuck, man.
You’ll be hittin’ posts, he’ll be readin’ Paul Krugman.
Maybe toe-to-toe, for half a half
But then it gets sloppy like a drunk giraffe.
Yo daily, monthly and yearly
Until the league sweethearts can see clearly
That Mega’s gonna dine at Sunny & Annie’s
While the Demons steal pizza outta trash can crannies
So when they’re in the neighborhood, you better duck
Cause Mega Touch is crazy as fuck
Facing off like they was Anthony Hopkins
But when they come back, man,
-they’re comin’ straight outta Tompkins
Prediction: Mega Touch 3, Denim Demons 2.
Board Woman Sheena v Ref Scheduler Alexa
Fresh Kills at Fuzz
Sheena is just one of those people that the more you talk to them, the more you like them. Ideas and conversations are enlightening. Then you remember that you have to play hockey against her… But really, you should go talk to her if you haven’t already.
Who ensures that every game has 2 refs? Alexa. She stepped into this role for the second year in a row. You should find Alexa this Sunday and say ‘Thank you.’
Prediction: Refs are paid off to make it an interesting game, 5-4 OT SO Fuzz.
Don’t forget to sign-up for the Annual Rose Charities Tournament!