Week 16 Previews – Part 1
GAME OF THE WEEK
Rehabs at Fresh Kills
Location: Tompkins West, 2:00 PM
By Rich “I Love Poutine But I Love Kehoe More” Glanzer
Game Keys:
Game of the Week just doesn’t cut it. With Stacey Kehoe and MDF playing in their last BTSH games (for now), this is Game of the Year.
But the two legends of the league are going to have to earn their going away victory, as they don’t play a scrub team like Gut Rot, the Riots, Mega, Math, Anklebiters, Rainbows, Gremlins, Cobra Kai, Butchers, POUTINE MACHINE, Sky Fighters, Tuques, WTP, Lbs., Demons, Filthy, or the Hookers. No, they play the defending champs, Fresh Kills.While the league will be rooting for the two friends, teammates, and roommates to go out in style, captain of Fresh Kills Dave Soko said, “If they die, they die.” Oooookkkkkayyy Dave, its just a regular season game buddy, win or lose there is no reason for either Meredith-Danberg- Ficarelli or Stacy Kehoe-Glanzer to die. So lets see who has the advantage.Keys to the Game.1) Who will handle The Pressure better?Ahhhh The Pressure. Its like this giant mountain looming over a shirtless Sherpa. We all know its there, both teams will feel it, but which team will handle it better? Welp, we know Fresh Kills thrives under pressure. The good regular season team turns great come the postseason with two championships in 4 years. The Rehabs have not handled it so well however, as they have yet to make a playoff run since the league (really) started in 2008.Big Edge to FK.2) Ice Water in Veins between FriendsBTSH has brought many people together, and what makes this league great is at 7:30, you will see five people from five different teams chilling, and drinking four PBR’s or High Life’s and a bottled Bud Light. But few teams are closer than the women of FK and the Rehabs. Stephanie Opitz and Sarah “Dead to me” Hobart are often seen palling around with Nora, Hilary and Erica. Kehoe is typically creeping somewhere around that mix as well. So which team will be able to put their game face on and end their friendship for an hour? I’ll go with the Rehabs. Not bc they can, but just because I picked FK in the pressure category. Plus, I have nothing against Nora or Hilary, and only mild angst against Erica. Meanwhile Opitz and Hobart both are on my list. (Though I feel bad that Opitz has never beaten me at Skee*T*Ball)Slight edge Rehabs3) Shaun deLaceyNow as for Shaun deLacey…did you know he has the leagues best goals against average? So which team will dump their goalie for this game, and add the leagues best? The Rehabs have too much, “Girl Power” to drop Hilary for the match, but Dave Soko has no problems telling Barch the game was moved to Corlears Park. Expect a Lime Green surprise in nets for FK.Huge advantage FK.Game Prediction. With two huge advantages for FK, and only a mini-token advantage to the Rehabs this game should be a route, 5-1 FK, especially when you factor in the Rehabs Suck. But what should and what will happen are two different things. And there is no way Kehoe and MDF are losing this game. Its going to be close, its going to OT and I expect that tan guy to put home the winner for the Rehabs. I forget his name, he’s not important anyways. 3-2 Rehabs OT.
“Sven Patrick,
At Ace on Sun, I overheard that Rich G won a bet and gets be in a relationship in Facebook with Stacey Kehoe if he had more goals this week (or something) so I had the brilliant idea of doing a weekly? btsh relationship story.. Well just really a mash up of 2 people.
Attached is the Rich/Stacey mash up. I call her RaceyHoe. I think it would look great on the website. Let me know what you think.
Best,
Josh”
Tompkins Square Riots at Dark Rainbows
Location: Tompkins East, 1:00 PM
Game Notes: Two teams that are better than their records indicate come together in an early afternoon clash. With not much to play for from a divisional point of view and a three-week break looming will both teams start their vacation early? Rumor has it that Josh and Sean are simply playing possum during the regular season and are already planning to put acid in the league’s collective Kool Aid come play off time. Given the non-conformist worldviews of most of their team, it’s understandable that they’re planning now and giving regular season games a bit of a short shrift. Meanwhile, the sorely missed Trevor has been spotted shooting balls against the side of a barn in Woodstock. If the Rainbows want to sneak him in to the playoff roster they may have to tip their hands in this under-the-radar match. Meanwhile, Amy Jones has spent the week trying to convince her Euro dominated side that the US doesn’t take the entire month of August off. The concept doesn’t seem to have gained much traction among her Continental Crew, most of whom have already decamped for Zeider und Zee. Sorry, Jonesy. Despite your impressive win last week, we’re calling this one for the hippies.
Cobra Kai at Gremlins
Location: Tompkins West, 1:00 PM
Game Keys: What is this? Twin week at BTSH? Both these teams have pulled off some unlikely victories. And both teams have lost games we would have picked them to win. So will the real ’80s movie inspired teams please stand up? Ryan and Greg are two of the most passionate Captains in the league so you know they’ll have their teams ready to play. The key to Cobra Kai’s play seems to be the status of oft-injured goalie Pete Lang. He was outstanding in his return from injury a couple of weeks ago. But critics fear that he rushed his return and may not be fully recovered. Will he prove vulnerable to John Rick’s now famous “shoot when the goalie has his back to you” play? Lang may not be up to the level of a Shon Delacy but if he’s fully fit, look for him to be the difference in this game.
Corlears Hookers at Denim Demons
Location: Tompkins East, 2:00 PM
Game Keys: Is it a return to glory for Adam’s Infernal Mob? It certainly looked that way as they easily handled the Elves, making TSP West look like something from the first Lord of the Rings movie. Sobbing elves everywhere is not a pretty sight. But even in their glory days the Demons struggled to contain the force that is the Corlears Hookers. Is it because robots don’t know fear? That’s the concept some long time league watchers have put forward. But just because Pete doesn’t let them cheer when they score goals doesn’t mean that the Hookers are heartless automatons. They’re all too human (Trust us. We’ve seen Eitel watch E.T. the Extraterrestial. Waterworks city.). No one knows this better than Coach, who will spend the hours before the game trolling the Hookers current Facebook posts in an effort to find just the right insults to hurl at approaching shooters. You’ve seen what he can do at the Parkside folks. Will the Purple People Eaters be the next team brought to tears by the evil machinations of the Demons? All I know is, if I were Dustin, I’d tell his squad to stay away form social media this week.