Currently viewing the tag: "Weekly Previews"

Let The Tournament Begin!

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Spoiler: Dude in the blue wins this fight, but eventually gets his leg bone broken by Chong Li.


Editor’s Note: The following was written by everyone’s favorite Denim Demon (which isn’t saying much), Jennifer Popack.  Although we at The ORG helped with her with some of the spreads to ensure accuracy, you can attribute all uses of the first person to her.

Because my football team and I broke up, I needed to fill a void, and the best solution is to become a complete degenerate and gamble on BTSH playoff games…which I’m now going to share with all of you!  You were obviously going to stick around and watch all the games on Sunday anyway, but now you have an even better reason to heckle teams and give a crap.

Here are the rules: we will generate a spread for each of the games throughout the playoffs. You have to make your selections each week in the attached excel grid and email it to me by Saturday afternoon. The person with the highest number of correct picks at the end of the playoffs will be the winner. If there’s a tie, the tiebreak will be your guess of total number of goals scored throughout the playoffs (closest total will win).  It’s just $5 to play, and the size of the pot will depend on how many people decide to join – so spread the word!!  (Venmo, PayPal, and cold hard cash are all acceptable forms of payment – jpopack <at> gmail)

Without further ado, here are this week’s spreads (playoff seed in parentheses):

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Denim Demons at La Famiglia

The BTSH Universe will be presented with quite the dilemma this Sunday at 3 PM. Watch Math-Elves on the East Court, or give Demons-Famiglia on the West Court a look…oh who are we kidding, everyone is going to watch Math-Elves! But if Denis, Shafiq, Creamy, Lisa, Kamen, Coach, Lee, Christina, and countless others participate in a game that no one watches, does it even exist?

Sorry Jenna, but Ben will not be watching your game on Sunday.

Sorry Jenna, but Ben will not be watching your game on Sunday.


Let’s assume it does, for a second, and do an old-fashioned tale-of-the-tape…
-The Demons beat the Elves early in the season, while La Famiglia split with the Elves over the summer. Advantage: DEMONS
-Neither team played Math this season. Advantage: PUSH
-La Famiglia has one former Math/Elf on their roster. The Demons have none. Advantage: FAMIGLIA
-Gil led the Elves with 18 goals. Jeff led the Demons with 16, while Denis led Famiglia with 12. Advantage: DEMONS
-Reffing…neither team came close to reffing as many games as Math or the Elves. Advantage: PUSH
-Adam Rubens would totally buy a Math shirt. Advantage: DEMONS

Looks like we have to take the Demons in this one, 3-1.
Rich: Assuming that no one that hasn’t played on either the Elves or Math will score, that would mean the Tuques win 1-0 on Cruff’s goal. It would also mean Craig is somehow in net for the Demons since Jenna scores on Craig in the playoffs. This all seems very plausible so I’ll go with the Tuques, 1-0 on this one. 

#20 Tompkins Square Riots at #13 Poutine Machine

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Fear not, Laura, it’s just crab.

Derek: The Riots’ offense was the worst in BTSH, producing just 23 goals this season (for comparison, this is tied with Fresh Kills’ Gabe Chenard).  Although Poutine has had to use backup goalie Rob Nitschke over the past few weeks, he’s played well in all-star Matt Leonard’s absence.  There’s a small chance of an upset here if TSR’s Dave Gil de Rubio can create some playoff magic between the pipes, but I still see the Machine edging it out in a 3-1 victory.
Rich: Dave steps up in the playoffs, but this will be too tall a task I fear, and Poutine gets a 3-2 victory. (And I kinda do fear that bc that means we play Poutine next)
Eli: Poutine’s offense isn’t much better than the Riots, and Matt Leonard has played in like three games since June, so the potential for a Riots upset exists. But Poutine squeaks it out, 2-1, in overtime.

#18 Mega Touch at #15 Gremlins

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Rod shows off his Terror Squad impression.



Derek: Do you think Devlin will fly in from Hollywood for this?  Neither do I.  I assume Adriano will be floating around to ignite Mega’s offense a little, but even then, Happy Jamie has had enough practice this season to put in a solid game for the Gremlins.  They move to the next round with a solid 4-2 win.
Rich: You assume wrong, as usual Derk. Adzo is missing the game. Hi Adriano! I know you will read this. Gremmies 3-0, and I get six months of gchatting from Julie telling me how they almost won.
Eli: My sources have informed me that Mega Touch is so shorthanded for Sunday that Jamie will be playing out for them. I’m still taking the Gremlins, 3-1.

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We exited last Sunday just as we entered it, with one playoff seed set and 19 others up for grabs.  With one week left, the playoff picture is still quite murky, although some things are beginning to clear up.  Of course, chaos can still reign. There could be a five-way tie for the #2 seed. Or potentially three four-way ties for various seeds.  But here are some of the key items to be aware of as we approach what should be a crazy six hours on Sunday…

Trying to figure out all of the playoff seed possibilities has us feeling like this right now. Hopefully things get clearer as Sunday goes along.

Trying to figure out all of the playoff seed possibilities has us feeling like this right now. Hopefully things get clearer as Sunday progresses.


Gremlins at Poutine Machine
Poutine Machine pulled into a tie with the Gremlins for fourth in the Glanzer Division with a 1-0 win on Sunday, setting this up as a winner-take-all battle to avoid relegation to the Greene Division next season. Of course, the loser of this game could go on a playoff run and win the championship, which would ironically send the winner of this game to the Greene Division. Both teams have already secured a place in the Opening Round playoff games on October 5, but sadly, an elusive third matchup in as many weeks seems unlikely.

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What The Puck @ LBS Inc.

Nick: It’s been a rough year for WTP as they enter a bit of a rebuild.  It will take some time for the team to come together, but I think they will bounce back nicely next season.  As for this game, they’re running into a LBS squad that is gearing up for the post-season.  I think the Corporation takes this one 5-1.
Eli: LBS, Inc. has used so many players this season that they’ll be happy to get out of this game without any more injuries. But a 3-1 win will be a nice bonus.
Rich: I probably should pick the Lbs. because I am going to try and convince Karstan to play in my Long Island hockey team. But I think WTP is going to win. So torn.
Derek: You could start by spelling Karsten’s name right.  4-1 LBS.

Dark Rainbows @ Mega Touch

Nick: Lots of recognizable faces in this matchup as Julie, Alex, and rookie stud Alok take on Aaron, Ramber (the Rachel + Camber celebrity couple name), and Abby.  The rest of the gang is all there as well, and this should be a spirited contest between two high-energy teams.  I’ll say that Mega wins it for Devlin, 3-2.

Oh, you said Ramber?  My mistake...we don't have any pictures for that.

Oh, you said Ramber? My mistake…we don’t have any pictures for that.

Eli: Devlin moved to California. Mega is playing for themselves now, but the Rainbows will take this one, 4-3.
Derek: I think the Rainbows get the solid 4-2 win here.
Rich: Intern Nick, you mention all these players and not mention Bernstein?!?!? This is why you are an intern and no one believes in you. Dammit Nick! Damn you! (Mega wins 3-2)

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