Recap Week 6

by Eli Kazin

The Games
THAT’S A VERY NICE JIG, KEARNEY. Brendan “Dutch” Kearney and Gavin Kearney each scored two goals, and Matthew Zimmerman added an insurance goal as the Corlears Hookers defeated the Tuques, 5-3. The Tuques were without their starting goalie and used Mathematics goalie Sarah Coombs as the replacement.

YES, SHANE, THAT REALLY WENT IN. Kevin Foster, Mike Sokolyansky, Shane DeBlasio, and Alexandre Frenette scored goals, and Dave Gil de Rubio registered the shutout, as Fresh Kills blanked the Bad Touch, 4-0. The win was the second in a row via shutout for Fresh Kills, and their fourth straight overall.

SOME PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED BY SHOOTOUTS. Arthur Revechkis gave the Mighty Squirrels the early lead, and Suvin Malik tied the game late in the first half for Filthy Gorgeous. After a scoreless second half and overtime, the game progressed into a shootout, where after two rounds, Joe Pereira’s goal was the lone tally. James Stein stopped the Mighty Squirrels final shot, which should have touched off a celebration for Filthy Gorgeous, except no one realized that the shootout was completed for a good fifteen seconds.

EL GUAPO IS SPANISH FOR THE HANDSOME ONE. Eric “El Guapo” DiPierri, filling in for starting goalie Mike O’Connor, allowed just one goal as the Gouging Anklebiters beat Mexican Standoff for their first victory of the season, 3-1. Megan Kelly, Nick Gardella, and Matt Tsiang scored for the Gouging Anklebiters, while Haanwa Chau scored the lone goal for Mexican Standoff, who continued their goalie rotation with Jeff “Peaches” Hendricks (first half) and John Bonfanti (second half).

DANIEL ALFREDSSON WAS HIS INSPIRATION. Just one day after Daniel Alfredsson’s overtime goal sent the Ottawa Senators to the Stanley Cup Finals, Micael Holmström scored the game-winning goal with 30 seconds left in regulation as the Denim Demons squeezed past the Mathematics, 2-1. Lena Moy-Borgen also scored for the Denim Demons, who were using backup goalie Noah Farkas, and Sharif “The Chocolate Buzzsaw” Corinaldi scored for the Mathematics.

TRY AS THEY MIGHT, THE LADIES CAN NOT RESIST ANT VENTOLIERI. Buoyed by the presence of a season-high six girls, Pork Fried Rice defeated the Sky Fighters, 4-3. Ant Ventolieri scored two goals and added two assists, Denis Monty contributed one goal and two assists, and Natasha Foy scored the game winner for Pork Fried Rice. Roderick Cruz of What The Puck played in goal for the Sky Fighters, and Ellery “The Nature Boy” Gillette was kept off the scoreboard, even though he does not play for the Sky Fighters or Pork Fried Rice.

ANOTHER SOLID WIN FOR THE UNICORNS. Chris Eng and Caitlin Ervin each scored two goals, and Ted Kilcommons and Hector “Showtime” Melendez added goals as the Unicorns sprinted by Cobra Kai, 6-2. Cobra Kai received goals from Dave Cicirelli and Ray Chan.

COREY “CHONGO” WINTERS IS PROUD TO BE FROM WINNIPEG. Winnipeg native Corey “Chongo” Winters scored two goals, including the game-winner, and Tom MacDonald and Darrell Hartman added two goals apiece as What The Puck remained undefeated with a 6-1 victory against the Dark Rainbows.

RAIN DOES NOT SLOW DOWN THE REHABS. Anthony Romeo recorded his second shutout of the season to lead the Rehabs to a 3-0 triumph against LBS.

Nickname Nook With Derek Tagliarino
These people will now be known as the following:
Ken Poulin of LBS is now The Alpha Male.
Zach Weiner of the Gouging Anklebiters is now Cryme Tyme.

Special Contest: This is your chance to fire back. It seems everyone in BTSH already has some sort of clever nickname for Eli and me. So now you can make it official. I challenge anyone who is reading this to submit (to the best nicknames you can think of for us. I will include the ones I deem the best in my next nook. I will also buy the winner one can of PBR (if I can get the league to finance it).

News and Notes
Jeff “Peaches” Hendricks used a sombrero in place of a goalie helmet, while Eric “El Guapo” DiPierri did not wear a helmet at all, but did use safety goggles. John Bonfanti, however, did choose to wear the traditional helmet…Why is it that Jennifer Chen of Fresh Kills is able to attend every game, but her fiancé, Brendan “Flounder” Hay, who played on Cobra Kai last season, is not even on a roster this season?…Most teams cheer when they score a goal, but the Corlears Hookers (and possibly Pork Fried Rice) choose not to…What The Puck’s win was their tenth straight dating back to the 2006 season…Unicorns goalie Craig Lacombe offered to play goal for the goalie-less Tuques, but his offered was declined by the Corlears Hookers, who stated that he could not play goal, but Sarah Coombs could…After the conclusion of the games at Corlears, a birthday cookout/beer fest for Alicia Walker of Fresh Kills took place with players from Fresh Kills, Bad Touch, and Mexican Standoff squaring off in two games of one-handed hockey (one hand on the stick, the other holding a beverage).

Upcoming Schedule
May 27th, 2007
No Games.

June 3rd, 2007
3pm Corlears 1 Fresh Kills vs. Corlears Hookers
3pm Corlears 2 Rehabs vs. Sky Fighters
3pm Moffo Denim Demons vs. Cobra Kai
4pm Corlears 1 LBS vs. Dark Rainbows
4pm Corlears 2 What The Puck vs. Mighty Squirrels
4pm Moffo Mathematics vs. Mexican Standoff
5pm Corlears 1 Pork Fried Rice vs. Bad Touch
5pm Corlears 2 Tuques vs. Unicorns
5pm Moffo GAME OF THE WEEK Filthy Gorgeous vs. Gouging Anklebiters
– These two teams met in the first round of the playoffs last year at Moffo, with Filthy Gorgeous winning, 7-1.

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