Karsten Is Offering Sean A Trade

#12 Dark Rainbows (9-7-0-1) at #5 LBS, Inc. (11-5-0-1)
Location: Tompkins East, 12:00 PM
All-Time Series: LBS, Inc. leads 9-6-1
2011 Result: Week 5 – LBS, Inc. 3, Dark Rainbows 2 (OT-SO); Week 18 – LBS, Inc. 5, Dark Rainbows 3
Game Notes: After a one-sided season series, these Hackett Division foes will meet for the third time this Sunday.  When the Dark Rainbows and LBS, Inc. met for the first time in Week 5, the Corporation stole a 3-2 shootout victory after a late tying goal by chief compliance officer Karsten Pichon.  When these teams squared off a second time in Week 18, Pichon was the hero once again, as his hat trick lifted LBS, Inc. to a 5-3 triumph.  However, despite sweeping the season series, the Corporation cannot overlook the Rainbows for several reasons.   First, the Rainbows actually finished with a better goal differential than LBS, Inc.  Second, they accomplished this feat despite missing last season’s team scoring leader, John Nielsen, for the bulk of the year, after teammate Luisa Mirarchi “accidentally” checked him.  Finally, Rainbows captain Sean Reynolds has vowed to break out his team’s old, faded pink jerseys in order to confuse LBS captain and CEO Sascha Puritz and her white-clad warriors.
Eli’s Pick: No pick.  Eli will be reffing this game.
Derek’s Pick: LBS, Inc.  The Corporation looked impressive in their final regular season game, when they slammed Hackett Division leader Fresh Kills 4-1.
Watchability: 4 Meyers

Alfred Is Facing A Watered-Down Version Of Himself

#14 Happy Little Elves (8-7-1-2) at #3 La Famiglia (13-1-1-2)
Location: Tompkins West, 12:00 PM
All-Time Series: Happy Little Elves lead 3-1
2011 Result: Did Not Play
Game Notes: After finishing the 2010 regular season on a seven-game winning streak, La Famiglia continued to shred its competition in 2011.  With just one loss in regulation, the team finished with the best record in BTSH to finally wrestle the Prince of Weyersberg trophy away from the Denim Demons.  La Famiglia boasted the league’s top goal differential, as well as its top scorer, Denis Miciletto, who averaged more than a goal per game.  However, one loss has stuck with Dave Ladanyi and company since last year’s playoffs, a 7-4 loss to the Happy Little Elves in the 2010 Round of 16.  While this loss left a bitter taste in the mouths of La Famiglia, it also marked the Happy Little Elves’ first playoff win in franchise history and spurred them on to the BTSH championship.  Thus, despite a mediocre 2011 regular season, the Elves still pose a major threat to La Famiglia.   They appear to have regained their hunger and desire from one year ago, as they soundly defeated the Tompkins Square Riots in last Sunday’s opening round game.
Eli’s Pick: La Famiglia. To improve the odds of a victory, captain Dave Ladanyi has given defensive stalwart Ant Ventolieri the last two weeks off.
Derek’s Pick: Happy Little Elves.  I’m not sure they have another championship run in them, but captain Rich Glanzer has at least one more trick up his sleeve.
Watchability: 4 Muggeos.  The scorekeeper (Eli) will have his hands full when the top two offenses in BTSH collide.

We’ve Had This Dutch Photo On File All Season Long

#18 Gouging Anklebiters (6-12) at #1 Corlears Hookers (11-6)
Written by playoff correspondent Rich Glanzer
Location: Tompkins East, 2:30 PM
All-Time Series: Corlears Hookers lead 4-0
2011 Result: Did Not Play
Game Notes: Twice I’ve picked the Anklebiters to win, and twice they have. Time for a hat trick? While many might expect an 8-1 drubbing…there is a way for the blue and gold to pull off the biggest upset in BTSH history. Phil’s bunch must play a tight, disciplined game and not try to run and gun with the Hookers. If they get the ball, dump it, forecheck their asses off and eliminate the home run pass from the Hookers arsenal, this game could be a lot tighter than anyone thinks. The Anklebiters have to slow this game down. Stop the transition play and make it more half court where the Hookers can’t rush up the court with speed. And lastly, the Anklebiters must convert on their chances. They surely will get outshot, but if they frustrate the Hookers enough, any team is bound to make mistakes.  Unfortunately, I’m quite sure the Anklebiters have never heard of BTSH.org, so they probably won’t get this message. The good news is I’m positive the Hookers never read these things, so it just takes one! All that said…I’m going with the drubbing.
Rich’s Pick: Hookers, 8-1
Watchability: 1, the All-Canadian American, Eitel.

Luke Is Excited To Be In The Big City

#11 Butchers (9-7-1) at #6 Unicorns (10-5-0-2)
Written by playoff correspondent Sven Larsen
Location: Tompkins East, 3:30 PM
All-Time Series: Tied 1-1
2011 Result: Week 5 – Butchers 3, Unicorns 0; Week 14 – Unicorns 5, Butchers 2
Game Notes: “You can use the horn to make a nice soup,” “I think they have more t-shirts than wins,” “LaCombe hasn’t been able to stop a beachball since he got married.” “Revechkis? My dog plays harder in the playoffs.” This is the kind of trash talk heard around ACE Bar last Sunday when these two teams found out they were destined for a first round matchup (at least I imagine that’s what they were saying, I wasn’t actually there). Regular season results don’t count for much here as the teams split their head to head matchups and had pretty similar records.  The Butchers were one of the Cinderella stories of last year’s playoffs, but they’re not going to catch anyone sleeping this year. The Unicorns, meanwhile, have had an issue with players letting their real lives interfere with beer league hockey. What’s up with that?  Whether the Unis will be able to shake off the loss of franchise player Chris and whether the Butchers co-captain Rachel Greene can stay focused on the game in front of her (instead of the 4:15 pm Jets-Pats kickoff) are key questions to be answered. Ultimately, this one comes down to the goalies. LaCombe and Ramirez are two of the best in the league, and one of them will probably steal this game for his team.
Sven’s Pick: I’m going with the Unicorns on this one. Age and treachery beats youth and skill for at least one more year.
Watchability: Three enchanted rump roasts.