Filthy Can’t Believe They’re In The Bratta Division

Opening Day 2012 is less than a month away, and as a special treat for the #BTSHUniverse, we are proud to unveil a new and improved set of conference and division names.  As per an executive decision by Rich Glanzer, the former Weyersberg and Schumacher conferences will now be known as the Tagliarino and Kazin conferences, respectively.  In addition, the former Rubens, Hackett, Donohue, and MacNeil divisions have been renamed to Bratta, Brown, Larsen, and Glanzer divisions.

As expected, there have already been several mixed reactions to these name changes.  Mega Touch co-captain Eric Devlin wondered, “Wait, why is it called the Glanzer Division?  People were really clamoring for these name changes, huh?”  Poutine Machine foreigner Jo-Ann Provencher seemed confused, asking, “What ‘appen to ze ‘ackett Division?”  League spark plug and occasional frequent heel, Luisa Mirarchi, strongly supports the new names.  She exclaimed, “I love these names, man!  I know all of the people they’re named after!”

After the usual offseason promotions and relegations, here are the conference and divisional alignments for 2012:

Tagliarino Conference
Bratta Division: Corlears Hookers, Denim Demons, Filthy Gorgeous, Fresh Kills, Happy Little Elves
Brown Division: La Famiglia, LBS, Inc., Rehabs, Sky Fighters, What The Puck

Kazin Conference
Larsen Division: Butchers, Cobra Kai, Dark Rainbows, Poutine Machine, Unicorns
Glanzer Division: Gouging Anklebiters, Gut Rot, Mathematics, Mega Touch, Tompkins Square Riots

As in 2011, each team will play the other four teams in its division twice, the other five in its conference once, and five teams from the other conference once.

Regular season play will commence on Sunday, March 25. As per tradition, Opening Day will consist primarily of divisional games and will feature a rematch of the preceding season’s championship. The full schedule will be released on Friday, March 2, but to whet your appetite, here is the Opening Day schedule:

TIME	LOCATION	GAME
12:00 PM	Tompkins East	Happy Little Elves at Corlears Hookers
12:00 PM	Tompkins West	Rehabs at La Famiglia
1:00 PM	Tompkins East	Sky Fighters at LBS, Inc.
1:00 PM	Tompkins West	What The Puck at Fresh Kills
2:00 PM	Tompkins East	Filthy Gorgeous at Denim Demons
2:00 PM	Tompkins West	Gouging Anklebiters at Unicorns
3:30 PM	Tompkins East	Mega Touch at Mathematics
3:30 PM	Tompkins West	Tompkins Square Riots at Gut Rot
4:30 PM	Tompkins East	Poutine Machine at Cobra Kai
4:30 PM	Tompkins West	Butchers at Dark Rainbows