GAMES TO WATCH FOR
By Arya Stark
With just one week left in the regular season before rain day tournaments, 70s proms and, eventually, playoffs, there’s a lot at stake for teams across the league. Games to watch for on the final day of the 2018 regular season:
Mathematics vs Butchers
This pivotal showdown pits the current 14 and 15 seeds against each other with seedings very much on the line. The winner of this match will have to face the suddenly surging Rainbows (winners of the Blakwolf Sweepstakes) in round one, while the loser will most likely get an arguably more favorable matchup with Gut Rot. The subsequent opponents, barring said upset, would be LBS for the winner and probably Fuzz for the loser. It’s a tough path either way but as much as people may stress about potential future matchups and such, everyone wants to go into the playoffs on a high note. These teams are the classic could-beat-or-lose-to-anyone types; going into the playoffs, both will be be a dangerous first round matchup
Storyline: One Herr in, one Herr out; Sarah’s back from injury and gearing up for the playoffs, but Cheeky is finally giving hers (pun intended) a break to heal and recover. Will that #herrnation swing be enough to give Sarah’s squad the victory? Or will Math be defeated, giving the Butchers the 14 seed and making Becca very, very happy.
Gouging Anklebiters vs Filthier
This game probably has the most playoff implications of them all. Filthier, having lost last week’s pivotal showdown with the LBS, can’t claim the division title, but a win would clinch 4th place for them (Fresh Kills would not be able to catch them due to Filthy having swept the season series). A loss, however, would open up that #4 spot for the Fresh Kills, unlikely but possibly for the Rehabs, and the longshot of a late Poutine surge to #4. Meanwhile, the Biters can’t catch anyone in front of them, but they need to win to prevent the teams behind from gaining ground on them. If they lose, Poutine is definitely going to pass them. The Gremlins will most likely grab a better seed as well. That would drop the Biters all the way down to 9th, although it really wouldn’t make that big a difference because whether they drop to 8 or 9, their first round matchup remains those very same Gremlins.
Storyline: Besides the playoff race, all eyes will be on Probie to see if he can take down the scoring title. He’ll have a tough test ahead of him with his final game being against elite goalie and DJ extraordinaire Tim K.
Rehabs vs Fuzz
This was the game that was circled on everyone’s calendar since the schedule came out and, of course, the release of “the letter.” In the past two months the hype and bad blood have ratcheted down a few levels to the point that Rich & Hicks were seen hanging out and not constantly throwing each other into fences in Ocean City before having their souls crushed by Fuzz captain Jeff in the final. Fuzz can’t drop below #2, but needs this game to maintain any hope of finishing #1 overall, although it would require a Cobra Kai loss on Sunday (in either of their remaining games). The Rehabs, meanwhile, can pass Filthy if they win, Filthy loses and the Rehabs make up eight goals of differential.
Storyline: Besides the Hicks defection, this has been one of the premier rivalries of the past couple years, giving us such classic storylines as the 2016 President’s Trophy Race (eventually won by Fuzz, with Rehabs winning the ship), the 2017 playoff classic (won by the Rehabs 1-0) and, of course, the fence shove heard ’round the world. Will Fuzz finally get over the hump this year and beat their archrivals? Having Glanzer miss the game is an excellent start.
Storyline: Besides the playoff race, all eyes will be on Probie to see if he can take down the scoring title. He’ll have a tough test ahead of him with his final game being against elite goalie and DJ extraordinaire Tim K.
Rehabs vs Fuzz
This was the game that was circled on everyone’s calendar since the schedule came out and, of course, the release of “the letter.” In the past two months the hype and bad blood have ratcheted down a few levels to the point that Rich & Hicks were seen hanging out and not constantly throwing each other into fences in Ocean City before having their souls crushed by Fuzz captain Jeff in the final. Fuzz can’t drop below #2, but needs this game to maintain any hope of finishing #1 overall, although it would require a Cobra Kai loss on Sunday (in either of their remaining games). The Rehabs, meanwhile, can pass Filthy if they win, Filthy loses and the Rehabs make up eight goals of differential.
Storyline: Besides the Hicks defection, this has been one of the premier rivalries of the past couple years, giving us such classic storylines as the 2016 President’s Trophy Race (eventually won by Fuzz, with Rehabs winning the ship), the 2017 playoff classic (won by the Rehabs 1-0) and, of course, the fence shove heard ’round the world. Will Fuzz finally get over the hump this year and beat their archrivals? Having Glanzer miss the game is an excellent start.
Cobra Kai vs Gremlins
This Southeast Division showdown will decide the #1 seed in the league, which really doesn’t mean much in BTSH but is better than nothing (arguably). By the time this game happens, Fuzz will have already played the Rehabs and Cobra Kai will have already played Mega. Assuming CK & Fuzz pick up the same # of points in these games, the Gremlins showdown will give Cobra Kai a shot at the #1 overall seed which I’m assuming would be their first President’s Trophy in franchise history. Older people can fact check this as I have literally nothing to go on except a vague feeling, although that seems to work pretty well for Zisser at the strip club. Anyway, strippers aside – if the Gremlins are able to pull the upset here and Fuzz beats the Rehabs, Fuzz would take the #1 seed while the Gremlins would be able to potentially move all the way up to #5 if (when) they beat the Riots at 6:00.
Storyline: While the savages at the dojo may get most of the attention, I’m more interested to see how the Gremlins respond to the challenge of facing an elite team in their regular season finale. Rockoff may still be in Australia playing in a Sunday cricket league (true story), but the SaltBoyz will have to find a way to will their team to a win without him (although willing JW to a decent +/- may be the more impressive accomplishment). Can the ridiculous car from the 70s take down the evil dojo from the 80s? BTSH enthusiasts and old people everywhere will be watching intently.