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BTSH Hammers Demons For Bounties

Did This Man Bring Down The Demons?

By Editor Emeritus Derek “Lazer” Tagliarino

In response to the findings of an intense, multi-year investigation of an alleged “bounty program,” disciplinary committee manager Georgine “Mulva” Paulin has levied one of the harshest punishments in the history of BTSH on captain Adam “Legend Killer” Rubens and the Denim Demons.  Effective immediately, Rubens has been suspended for one year from all league-related activities.  In addition, Paulin has suspended former Demons defensive coordinator Abby “Tayne” Meisterman (now with the Dark Rainbows) for her involvement in the “crush for cash” scandal.  As a team, the Demons have been fined $500 and will have its roster frozen until next offseason.  Team veteran Dave Shyu has taken over as interim captain.

According to Paulin, Rubens and Meisterman instituted a system several seasons ago in which cash payouts and other incentives such as PBR and Demons merchandise were handed out to players directly responsible for injuring opponents.  Paulin described the situation as “egregious and totally unacceptable.”  She made it clear that she wanted to send a message by taking such a harsh stand on this issue.

Rubens, meanwhile, issued the following statement in response to the penalties:

We recognize the league’s concern, and we deeply regret the mistakes we have made in the past.  To our fans, BTSH, and the rest of the league, we can only offer our sincere apology and take full responsibility for these serious violations.  It has always been the goal of the Denim Demons to create a model franchise and to impact the league in a positive manner.  There is no place for bounties in our league, and we pledge that this will never happen again.

Rumors are circulating that Paulin and the league office first became aware of this issue through the reports and accounts of an anonymous former Demons player.  Although nothing has been confirmed, current goaltender Aaron “Coach” Pagdon has alleged several times via Twitter that former player, Ellery “The Nature Boy” Gillette (now with Gut Rot) is the “snitch.”  Pagdon later noted, “He should know better.  Whatever happens in the locker room should stay in the locker room.”  As of now, Gillette has vehemently denied any involvement in the league’s investigation and has even called for Pagdon to be suspended for defamation of character.

Reaction to this news has been mixed around the league.  Filthy Gorgeous captain Monica Russo commented, “I’m amazed this has blown so far out of proportion.  Every team does this.  It’s unfortunate that a good man like Adam [Rubens] has to pay the price.”  However, Sky Fighters captain Dan Hopper felt differently, noting, “I’m truly shocked and appalled at what some teams will stoop to in order to gain a competitive advantage.  The real key to success is to find some players from Czechoslovakia.”  Regardless of these differing viewpoints, Paulin’s ruling is sure to have a lasting impact on the 2012 season and the future of BTSH.

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