From the daily archives: "Wednesday, August 21, 2019"

written by Cat

Rich has reluctantly added me back on the media payroll, Isaac is gone, Alex and JW are my editors, so you’d think I couldn’t get away with my usual shit (ie. soft stars, soft jokes about the beef beat, rainbows propaganda,) but guess what? I only sing one song, suckers.

THIRD STAR

Shannon from the Anklebiters

I don’t like to compliment anyone on the Biters except for Probert and only when he gets us drink specials but I am a woman who supports women so go Shannon!

Cobra Kai and Gouging Anklebiters went like 6 or 7 rounds in an overtime shootout. Craig ultimately never let anything past him; and Shannon got the game-winning goal.

This is a real two-fer because Rich hates shootout goal stars, and he hates giving stars to girls for scoring.

No autographs, please.

SECOND STAR

Dan from the Dark Rainbows

Have you heard of Dan yet?

He is Canadian. Dan is short for a woman’s name. His girlfriend brings a dog that will allow us to put a wizard hat on it. Dan is very talented at hockey. And he scored both of our goals on Sunday, wrenching us out of a tough 7 game losing streak. Unconfirmed but these might have been his first career BTSH goals, I am fuzzy on the stats, but that is mindblowing if you have seen him take the ball from end to end as many times as I have. If you poach him, Jess will set fire to your home (allegedly).

FIRST STAR

Rain cleaners

To complete my soft stars, first star goes to the good samaritans who stayed and cleaned the courts in the downpour, rather than fleeing to Doc Holliday’s and ordering beers.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

BTSH media for getting its groove back with pizza previews + flow feature

Filthier for eking out a shutout with just 7 players – Ann played the whole game and scored the game-winning goal, and great playing by Kate (with a bad back no less!) and Jean.