15) Butchers

Richie Hero: The Butchers have had a history of deep playoff runs, as they made it to the semis in 2010 and 2011, the first two years of their existence. With such a proud history, I have to believe they want revenge on the Rainbows for beating them last year. Yetter is the best player on the court, but I’m going to go with RGII and the Butchers. They prob can’t beat the Lbs. so they better hope for one upset, but if they play the Anklebiters, it will be a good game. 

Arya: As the 15th seed there’s no way mathematically for the Butchers to play the #1 seeded LBS in the Round of 16.  But they will give whomever they do face (Biters or Hookers) a lot of trouble if they play the way they can. Of course, they have to get there first and getting by a Rainbows team that eliminated them last season and improved won’t be easy.  They will get a slight lift in getting Tarzan back from his latest ACL surgery, but will it be enough? I give them 50/50 to get by the Bows but the Biters and Rehabs probably have too much firepower.

Meatbox: The Butchers are one of the hardest teams to read in this entire bracket. It seems like every year they give some of the top teams in the league trouble (wins over Hookers & Rehabs this year, while constantly giving trouble to the Lbs), but then they get upset in games they shouldn’t (see last years play-in matchup with the Rainbows). That being said, they are one of the two teams playing in the play-in round that I would be the least surprised to see make it to the elite 8. Just comes down to who shows up for them starting this weekend.

JW: This is the game of the week, and will likely be one of the tightest games in the entire playoffs. The Butchers will be itching to get revenge for last year, and the New Rainbows will be itching to prove they’re the real deal. This one goes to OT, but Jessica is not the hero this time (and even if she was, I won’t be there to film it). The OT hero……is Arthur.

14) Fresh Kills

Meatbox: Ah, the other of the “two play-in teams the meatbox would be the least surprised to see win two playoff games.” How Fresh Kills ended up in this position is beyond me (jk, their attendance woes could sink any team’s hopes), but the talent to make a deep run is absolutely there. I think they’ll handle business with the Riots in round 1, then don’t be surprised if they pull the upset over the Hookers in round 2, a team they already beat this season. A third serving of Fresh Kills vs Lbs in round 3, yes please (although I’d expect the Lbs to take this one).

Richie Hero: The BTSH God (Christos the Hawk) has a way of (probably literally) shitting on teams that shit on the regular season. While they have the talent to win it all, I just don’t think they deserve it. Hookers beat them in Round 2. That said, this is a perfect example of why I think we should change the playoff structure to the top half teams get to choose their playoff opponents, who finished in the bottom half. 

JW: I am not even going to dignify Rich’s ridiculous suggestion with a response (wait, I guess I kinda just did). What I will say is that this is the lowest I have even seen FK finish in all my years in the league (it may be the lowest they’ve EVER finished)? Their attendance issues have already been touched on, but to be honest I wonder if they still have what it takes to hang with the top teams even if everyone does show up. Is this the beginning of the end for FK’s dominance? I would hate to think so, they’re a clean and friendly team whose success you’ve never been able to be mad at. In any case, they handily beat the Riots, and then they MIGHT upset the Hooks in the next round, but that’s as far as they go this year. 

Arya: Full disclosure: in the midseason power rankings I was the only person to rank the Fresh Kills #1.  They had just beaten the LBS, who are obviously sexy, and when everyone shows up they’re a tough team to handle.  Unfortunately Gabe is operating at less than 100% after rolling his ankle in consecutive weeks and they’ve looked oddly mortal this season, somehow finishing as the 14 seed meaning we’ll be treated to the bizarre sight of Division 1 minus the Fresh Kills next season.  They always have a chance to win it, but I don’t think this is the year. That being said they’ve won a championship every three years (2008, 2011, 2014, 2017) so next season should be the one.

13) Mega Touch

Richie Hero: Congrats Mega, I wish we would have had an immediate rematch when Gut Rot beat us. Last year I reffed the Rehabs/Mega game and it was relatively close. I also reffed the playoff game against Filthier and they only lost 2-1 (Shelly was not there). Mega has had major playoff upsets in the past and I expect them to play really hard in their obvious and eventual loss to the Rehabs. 

Arya: If Shelly shows up, they’re beating Gut Rot – it’s that simple.  They’ll probably win if Matt Jones shows up too as long as he avoids a backbreaking overtime giveaway.  Julie is a great player, a great captain and a great American but I will be rooting hard for Gut Rot, not just so I can see how Morgen celebrates if they win but also because, as Meatbox touched on earlier, it would lead to a Round of 16 Rehabs/Fresh Kills showdown which would edge out Filthy/Fuzz as the game of the week.  I think Mega is close to 85% to win this game though and subsequently close to 5% to beat the Rehabs.

Meatbox: Mega limps into the playoffs having gone 3-5-1 in the second half of the season. At one point looking that would receive a first round bye, they instead will have to get by Gut Rot in the play-in round, a team they split their season series with. Assuming Mega has the full team show up, I would expect them to win that one and advance where the apparently hot (Thanks for blowing up our spot, Isaac) Rehabs are waiting. As Frey would say this is, “not good.”

JW: This is no longer the Mega of yore. Julie has added some stellar talent in the last couple years, and it shows (when that talent shows up, of course). As long as they can stop Heather from scoring they’ll beat Gut Rot, and then lose to the Rehabs by less goals than one might think. 

12) Gremlins

Richie Hero: The last time the Gremmies won a playoff game was in 2015 against the Demons. That’s probably more than the amount of times they hung with the rest of the league, since. They have the talent to beat WTP and the Anklebiters and have a beer at Doc’s but let’s be honest, none of that is going to happen. 

Meatbox: I’m just here for JW’s personal +/- prediction. 

JW: I wasn’t going to mention my +/- but since The Meatbox did, I imagine it will probably be even with 0 pluses and 0 minuses, as usual. (Though certainly not even against WTP this season, sigh.) In what has to be a rare occurrence, 4 of the 5 teams in the 3rd division are playing against each other in the Round of 16. (WTP vs. Grems, and Karma vs. Poutine). The Pucks are the only team in division 3 who swept the Grems this year, so we will be out for some revenge. In any case, no prediction from me as I’ll be reffing this game. (Only veteran BTSHers get this reference.)

Meatbox pt. 2: I just want to point out how cool Walker is making inside jokes that predate the millennials. 

In all seriousness, the Gremlins looked great on Sunday and they have the talent to beat WTP, so an “upset” here wouldn’t be all that surprising. I expect this to be a tightly contested matchup, with Hogg, Susie & co completing the season sweep by defeating Rockoff & the Gremlins in the battle of the Hungry Hippos (it’s a D5 reference Walker, don’t overthink it).

Arya: Walker doesn’t play D5.  15 person rosters = not enough playing time for him.

College basketball fans know that the 5/12 matchup is always rife for an upset.  I’m always a sucker for the Gremlins who have a roster seemingly packed with studs (Erich, Cody, Salt Boyz, Marcella, Courtney, Jamie in net), plus Walker always tells me that he rarely gives up goals when he’s out there so it would be a very long-winded and elaborate con job if he was lying about that.  I too wouldn’t be surprised to see them pull the upset and move on to the quarterfinals; truth be told, they should be there. But something always seems to get in the way, and I bet it will again this year.

11) Fuzz

JW: The-team-formerly-known-as-the-Elves struggled in the regular season, but they tend to come alive in the playoffs. I’ve already stated (elsewhere) that this year the Cup will either go to Lbs, the Rehabs, or Fuzz. If Fuzz, it will be the first time in (what Rich calls) the Modern Era that a team has ever won back-to-back PBR Cups (maybe the first time, ever?). I hope this doesn’t happen. Not because they’re the team who lost the original PBR Cup, but because I hate to see one team dominate. 

Richie Hero: Last year I complained that after a great regular season where we came in 2nd, our path was Math, Rehabs, Lbs. and Cobra Kai. Simply put, that’s ridiculous we had to do that. This year there will be no bitching, as we came in 11th, and got what we deserved. The path would appear to be Filthier, Lbs., Anklebiters, Rehabs. Let’s go. 

Meatbox: Fuzz as an 11 seed. Where have we seen this story before? Ah yes, 2017, however, this time the Rehabs did the heroic thing and finished 4th instead of 2nd making it all but impossible for Rehabs vs Fuzz in the Elite 8. Rehabs vs Fuzz in the finals though? Now that is juicy (and completely possible this time). Fuzz has one of the bigger challenges in the round of 16 with their matchup against Filthier, but they’re also coming into the playoffs en fuego having won 7 of their last 8 (basically once Jeff declared it was a “NEW SEASON” after scoring an OT winner against Rehabs, it quite literally became a new season for Fuzz Nation). Look for them to stay hot and make a deep run this postseason.

Arya: Fuzz had a championship hangover that belied their general distaste for boozing with the league, but turned it around big-time after their “new season” thing that Mr Meatbox alluded to in between rounds of Taco Bell violence on the toilet (sorry – just being realistic).  The strange thing is in theory this team isn’t that different from last year’s – they replaced Alyssa and Coach with Andrea and Tim Brown and should have had enough depth to make up for Paul’s departure. Adding Eitan (different dude than you’re thinking, same Jewish flavor) midseason helped with secondary scoring but they’ll need to find their swagger if they’re going to make a deep run.  If I was listing teams in order of likelihood they’ll win the championship this year, they’d be around 4 or 5. They obviously have the talent to win it again, but I don’t think they will. On the bright side, that means LJ won’t get blamed for losing the PBR Cup this year.