I was not at the courts on Sunday, but lucky for you, we had fresh game sheets (as of Week Ocho!) to codify the All Star Sunday that was. I also figured out the trick to the strikethrough font on WordPress. Should there be any inconsistencies, Team Stats pages will be reconciled by end of the week, we hope.
Filthier 3 @ 1 and 34 cents USD’s 4 Bucks
Filther – James P (6), JJ (2), Sunny (7)
Goalie Loss – Tim K (6-3, 1 Shutout, GAA of 1.78)
Brexit Currency – Nick R (2), Jason (1), ScottyK (11), Avery (2)
Goalie Win – Sizzler (7-1, 2 Shutouts, GAA of 1.50)
Game Notes: Avery probably stole the ball from Sasha (probably) on the GwG
Gremlins 2 @ Continued Karnage 0
Gremlins – Erich (13), Alexandra “Salt Bro #2” Rockoff (1)
Goalie Shutout Win – Jamie B (6-2-1, 2 Shutouts, GAA of 1.89)
Goalie Loss – Steve F (2-4, 1 Shutout)
Game Notes: Karma continues down a path of no return to battle for a Michaliga Southeast division spot in 2019 with the Demons, should the latter team ever decide to play any of their future or currently rained out contests
Cobra Kai 2 @ Riots 3 (OT/LOL SHOOTOUTS)
Cobra Kai – Paul “Dustin” Brown (4), Liam (5)
Goalie Shootout Loss – Campbell (6-0-2, 2 Shutouts, GAA of I’m no longer keeping track of the true extra time in OT for GAA, 1.13)
Riots – Margot ? (1), David Frost (1)
Shootout Winner – Mike Danton’s favourite** player agent (“not”)
Goalie Shootout Win – Dave GdR (1-6-1)
Game Notes: I was told Russ was saving his goal for 2018 for the Riots but he only channeled the pre 2018 capitals in the shootout (not that that would have counted as a goal, unless it was the winner, kind of) and miraculously choked
Quick Shifts: Paul Brown recorded the first Gordie Howe hat-trick of the season; because Sam Norris doesn’t track assists, it’s neither official nor confirmed (1 goal, 1 five minute penalty – close enough to a fighting major). Bring forth your angry emoji, GLNZR.
Butchers @ Fresh Kills – Rain out
Game Notes: Fresh Kills just wanted to make the power rankings more ambiguous by deciding to not make the trip down to TSP on Sunday.
Demons @ Poutine – Rain out
Game Notes: Something on the game sheet probably needs to be corrected, regardless of the game being rained out.
Rehabs 4 @ Anklebiters 1
REEEhabs – (B)Ryan McC(abe) x3 (3), Cherie (6)
Goalie Win – Eric “Did not have to sit him for 2 minutes” Ramirez (4-1, 2 Shutouts, GAA of 1.40)
‘Biters – Ben P (13)
Goalie Loss – Craig LaC (4-2, 1 Shutout, GAA of 2.50)
Game Notes: Hicks, even though he loves everyone in the league, still clearly needs a demo on using his True A6 series. But since I shoot left, please take in the following Pavel Barber tutorial for all you backwards shooting-right handed american folk.
Dark Rainbows 0 @ Gut Rot 3
Goalie Loss – Greenwald (1-6)
Gut Rot – Ramon x2 (4), Becca (1)
Goalie Win – Ed P (2-4, 1st Shutout, GAA of further mean reversion, slowly but surely, it will be explicitly reported in a writeup, we he hopes)
Game Notes: I wonder who Jess D decided to not shake hands with after this shutout loss. Not to say she isn’t a good sport, relatively speaking. No offense! It’s also nice to see some Rainbows come to the bar now that they’ve won a game (they no longer feel the need to hang out practice on random rooftops somewhere in the NYC burroughs)
Quick Shifts: Becca truly earned her all star game nomination by finally scoring a goal this season, albeit, an empty netter, however I guess it counts for more than Liz’s does when she subbed in against the Riots.
CaNucks 3 @ Mega Deuce
Pucks – Susie (3), Paul P (6), Noah C (1)
Goalie Win – Scott H (2-5)
Mega – Alex EMey (3), Julie (3)
Goalie Loss – Mike T (2-6)
Game Notes: I was told that Susie’s goal was allowed because Julie scored. This was a Sam Norris email chain I was in on, but still don’t fully understand the inside joke. Bring some more angry emoji, GLNZR.
NJ/Vegas Betting Lines: Both states asked that BTSH betting lines to be momentarily banned after noting that the “best player in this matchup” was never appropriately listed as “resting at home for a meaningless out of town tournament with a team of ringers the following weekend” aka OUT of the lineup. Game previews will have to be revisited going forward…
WTP IR Report
“Dude” – no longer drowning in pitcher dousage
Justin SM-Liga – no longer pinot poisoned
Eric – day to day with crypto bear market tendonitis
Zac – out indefinitely with post traumatic sprain disorder / swollen ankle recovery soreness
Susie – concussion like symptons from the light headedness caused from the europhoria of leading the team in goals (after Paul “John Scott All Star Nominee of 2018” P)
Hookers @ BLUE SKIES – Rain out
Rain out Notes: I always thought that Cro was a Genwunner but he’s clearly living in the third gen of Pokemon where the effect Drizzle lasts for the entirety of the battle game day.
No Quick Shifts: The US labour** participation rate lags 4 percent behind the OECD member nations’ but at least it’s higher than the Hookers’ participation attendance record thus far in 2018. Their unemployment free agency/waiver wire rate is clearly deflated.
Fuzz 7 @ Lil’Maths 2
Fuzz – RNV (8), Mike “Why are you asking in a power ranking poll if someone else will win the goal scoring title?” Teyt x2 (11), Miles H (9), Who’s your [Vlad]dy (1), Gil (4), Alyssa (1)
Goalie Win – Eitan via #RosterHimAfterCoachRetires
Math – James Bobblehead (2), Sam “We’re [not] getting hot at the right time” Norris (2)
Goalie Loss – David L (1-5)
Game Notes: Math are really showing their “we don’t care about the regular season” attitude lately and Ryann picks up a respectible BTSH hat-trick with a goal, disallowed goal, and a beer at the bar after the game (presumably), or at least while watching the All Star game.
Quick Shifts: RIP to Liang’s GAA.
All-Star Game Notes (OT/DizzyBats)
Game Notes: The ending of the game was uninterrupted by an early sunset or some TV show that I don’t watch and cannot remember if it was some finale or season premier, like in 2017. Meh.
Team D’Arcy Tucker (that little Mofo’er) Divisions Southeast 1 and Southeast 4 8
Avery scored, probably, and is now annoyed Alex made him stay the extra 6 hours to play in what he thought would be a serious all-star game
Paul made sure to hang out with his bff, the crease, some more
Team Fairy Tale Cup Divisions Southeast 2 and Southeast 3 8
With his/herr new look, Rockoff secured some digits on Sunday evening (for his client’s 2019 contract)
GLNZR was burned on a Cherie breakaway effort
Overheard from TSP:
“Caaaaaaaaawwwwww. Mine. Mine. Mine.” – Tia
“Dizzy Bats was the bees knees” – Julie
“The All Star Fuzz 5:30 game sucks” – Jeff, somewhere in NJ, playing real playoff ball hockey
Week 9 in Tweets
Made a few up on the spot. Enjoy your weekend away from the courts! #DoubleClick