Rehabs at Fresh Kills
Narrative: Rematch of last year’s explosive PBR Cup Final.
Prediction: Rehabs unveil their new weapon (Hicks) and hand FK their first regulation loss since September 18, 2016, 4-3.
Denim Demons at Cobra Kai
Narrative: Welcoming the Demons to the Katz Division are the wily Cobra Kai. Brad is one of the league’s best two-way defenseman, but Liam lead that trend back in 2016.
Prediction: A nail biter that goes into OT with Zach 2.0 (Demons’ shiny new toy) showing his worth by getting his team the W, 3-2.
Poutine Machine at Gremlins
Narrative: Two teams with completely different styles of play face off in the first of two meetings this season. Poutine said bombyoyage to Adam and Teddy and filled their positions with meh talent. While the Gremlins are still trying to woo the talents of Sean who is caught in a three team battle for his services. (Ed. note: As my younger doppleganger, you know your destiny is Karma.)
Prediction: From the drop this one has the intensity of a playoff game, but in the end Jamie steals a W for his under-performing Gremmies, 3-1.
Butchers at Filthier
Narrative: Two of the cleanest teams in the league that also possess some of the finest talent too. Georgine and her Butchers get their first taste of life in the Soko Division.
Prediction: Brady and Cheeky quickly discover they aren’t in the Katz Division anymore and Filthy’s title campaign starts off strong, 5-2.
LBS, Inc. at Mathematics
Narrative: A potential playoff final four preview of two teams that didn’t do much in the offseason, but they also didn’t need to.
Prediction: The resilient Math find a way to tie the game up late, but Avery and Klion are the heroes in OT, 5-4.
Gouging Anklebiters at Sky Fighters
Narrative: The new look Sky Fighters clash against the old-school Biters. Caroline was active at the Free Agent Scrimmage and the latest scuttlebut is that Biters are bringing on a ringer.
Prediction: Tough sledding for the Sky Fighters as they have difficulty finding a rhythm and the Biters chemistry easily wins them the game, 4-1.
Fuzz at Corlear’s Hookers
Narrative: Trying to climb their way back into BTSH elite, the Hookers face off against a stocked Fuzz team now equipped with the unstoppable force of Mike T.
Prediction: The Hookers are quickly reminded how the Fuzz ran over the league in 2016 as they get pancaked, 5-1.
Mega Touch at Dark Rainbows
Narrative: A true BTSH match-up of some of the media’s favorite teams. Tuckman and Mega are back in a familiar place and Tia and her Rainbows begin their redemption tour.
Prediction: Mega goes merrily skipping back into the Michaliga Division and into the L column as the Rainbows pull off their best UMBC impression, 9-6.
Instant Karma at What the Puck
Written by JW
Narrative: Karma added some new rookies, including some firepower. As for What The Puck…do they still have an insanely huge roster? I actually don’t know. Does Corey W even still live in New York? I miss that guy.
Prediction: Emily’s Facebook polls kept us entertained all winter long, but Karma will have the last laugh here as they take this one 4-2. Also, Chadwick injures his back. (That last part was incredibly easy to predict.)
Gut Rot at Tompkins Square Riots
Narrative: This is shaping up to be a challenging year for Gut Rot. First they receive news of Taco Chulo closing, find out about the agave shortage and now their season kicks off with a rematch of last year’s playoff match-up.
Prediction: That Riots defender, Kevin Z., can move the ball and will pump up the tempo and his team in the W column, 4-2.