Who Doesn’t Enjoy A Good Popsicle?

GAME OF THE WEEK
Denim Demons (7-1) at Corlears Hookers (5-2)
Location: Tompkins West, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: Corlears Hookers lead 3-1
Game Notes: In the short time since the establishment of the Corlears Hookers in 2007, the Denim Demons have become one of their fiercest opponents.  The rivalry took off in 2008 when the Demons became the first team to hand the Hookers a loss at Moffo.  In 2009, the animosity intensified even further when league scheduler Jeremy “The Foot” Schumacher assigned both teams to the same division (later named the Rubens), forcing them to face off twice in the regular season.  The Hookers took the first of these games in Week 2, when they squeezed past the Demons with a 3-2 win in a shootout.  In Week 19, the Hookers completed the season sweep with a 4-1 win.  However, the Fightin’ Rubens had the last laugh, as they ultimately won the Rubens Division title and were the top seed in the playoffs.  With both the Denim Demons and Corlears Hookers once again in the Rubens Division, they will duel twice more this season, with the second matchup taking place on September 26.  As this rivalry opens a new chapter in its history, expect an intense game from both sides.
Keys To The Game:
1. After a string of four successive one-goal victories, the Demons won another close game last Sunday, 4-2 against Mega Touch. Their ability to come through in high-pressure situations will only serve them well against the veteran and talented Hookers.
2. Due to excessive absences and freak injuries, Jason Eitel has been a very small part of the Hookers’ offense this season.  However, proud parent of Dutch’s niece, Gavin “Dutch’s Brother” Kearney has picked up the slack and leads the team with eight goals.
3. Congratulations to Denim Demon Steve Chernoski, who will be tying the knot on Saturday. Although he is happy to have several of his teammates in attendance for this joyous occasion, he may be in for an unexpected surprise. Unfortunately, when Chernoski requested to have “Rubens’ Rock” at the wedding, the DJ misunderstood him and will thus be playing only Steely Dan.
Eli’s Pick: Corlears Hookers.  I’m not quite sure what the state of the Demons will be after an intense night of partying.
Derek’s Pick: Denim Demons.  An intense game in the summer heat goes to the team with the deeper bench.
Watchability: 5 Chernoskis.  May your first child be a masculine child.

Cobra Kai (5-3) at LBS, Inc. (2-5-0-1)
Location: Tompkins East, 1:00 PM
All-Time Series: LBS, Inc. leads 3-2
Game Notes: These teams last met in the opening round of the 2009 playoffs when LBS, Inc. blanked Cobra Kai 4-0.  However, just a few weeks prior, the Dojo stunned the Corporation with a shootout win in Week 19 of the regular season.  Cobra Kai’s Will Kuhns scored the tying goal with six seconds remaining in regulation and was the only player to convert his shootout attempt.
Eli’s Pick: LBS, Inc.
Derek’s Pick: Cobra Kai.  With the addition of several new players in the last few weeks, they have looked extremely impressive.
Watchability: 4 Chernoskis

Mathematics (1-5-0-2) at Gouging Anklebiters (4-3)
Location: Tompkins West, 1:00 PM
All-Time Series: Mathematics lead 4-2
Game Notes: With a full moon expected on Saturday, the Mathematics can breathe a sigh of relief as known Anklebiter werewolf Charles DeFranco will not have his super-human strength, speed, and sense of smell available on game day.  Regardless, Mathematics big-game hunter Mike Smith has vowed to load his blunderbuss with silver bullets should DeFranco get out of hand.
Watchability: 3 Chernoskis.  The better show may be on Saturday night when DeFranco car surfs on his new stepvan, the “Wolfmobile”, and leads his basketball team against the rival Dragons.

Happy Little Elves (4-3-0-1) at Poutine Machine (3-4)
Location: Tompkins East, 2:00 PM
All-Time Series: First Meeting
Game Notes: Despite a valiant effort to come back from a 4-0 deficit, the Happy Little Elves suffered a heartbreaking 5-4 loss last week against Hackett Division rivals, the Dark Rainbows.  Worse yet, the loss shattered all hopes the Elves once had of finally capturing their first Fairy Tale Cup.  Likewise, Poutine Machine lost a tough division game to the Tompkins Square Riots, as the Riots scored the game-winner with 2:30 remaining in regulation.
Eli’s Pick: Happy Little Elves.  At least they still have the Barnacle Bowl.
Derek’s Pick: Happy Little Elves
Watchability: 2.5 Chernoskis

Gut Rot (2-5-0-1) at La Famiglia (2-5)
Location: Tompkins West, 2:00 PM
All-Time Series: First Meeting
Game Notes: Gut Rot won in a shootout last week.  La Famiglia did not.
Eli’s Pick: La Famiglia
Derek’s Pick: La Famiglia
Watchability: 2 Chernoskis

Filthy Gorgeous (5-2-0-1) at What The Puck (7-0)
Location: Tompkins East, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: Filthy Gorgeous leads 3-2
Game Notes: Thus far, both of these Rubens Division teams have met the lofty expectations they had on Opening Day.  What The Puck has cruised through the competition, scoring a league-leading 36 goals, while allowing the fewest (12).  Filthy Gorgeous has also excelled, as the team boasts the second best goal differential in BTSH.
Eli’s Pick: What The Puck.  They were missing a lot of players last week and still won by four.
Derek’s Pick: No pick.  Derek will be reffing this game.
Watchability: 4 Chernoskis

Rehabs (4-3-0-1) at Sky Fighters (5-3)
Location: Tompkins East, 4:30 PM
All-Time Series: Sky Fighters lead 5-3
Game Notes: The Sky Fighters saw their five-game winning streak snapped last week at the hands of the Unicorns, but still hold a share of first place in the ultra-balanced Hackett Division.  The Rehabs, who also lost last Sunday, are tied for third in the division, just one point out of first place, but also sit just one point out of last place.
Eli’s Pick: Sky Fighters
Derek’s Pick: Sky Fighters
Watchability: 4 Chernoskis.  With just two points separating first from last place in the Hackett Division, all divisional games take on an extra level of importance.

Butchers (1-5-0-2) at Fresh Kills (5-2-0-1)
Location: Tompkins West, 4:30 PM
All-Time Series: Fresh Kills lead 1-0
Game Notes: In the Week 4 meeting between these two Donohue Division foes, Fresh Kills rookie goaltender Patrick Barch notched the second of his three shutouts to date.  Dave Sokolyansky and Ariel Imas scored the only goals of the game, giving Fresh Kills a 2-0 victory.
Eli’s Pick: Fresh Kills
Derek’s Pick: Fresh Kills.  There’s good potential for Barch to record his fourth shutout of the season here.
Watchability: 2.5 Chernoskis

HOCKEY NIGHT IN TOMPKINS (National Telecast)
Written by Hockey Night in Tompkins Correspondent Jesse Kalb
Dark Rainbows (4-2-0-2) at Unicorns (4-3)
Location: Tompkins West, 5:30 PM
All-Time Series: Unicorns lead 6-4
Game Notes: A traditional rivalry that former league commissioner SB used to call something we can no longer print on the league website. Seriously, when did BTSH get so corporate? Back in the day, we played in the rain (we sure as hell didn’t sit in Doc Holliday’s mewling about getting water in our shoes like these kids today), and Unis goalie Craig LaCombe would streak the All-Star game with his 2.5 inches of glory flapping in the breeze. Ahhh, 2004. What a time.
Vegas Line: Pick-em
Jesse the Greek says: Unicorns. They are finding ways to win the close ones.
Watchability: A classic matchup. 5 Shockers.

HOCKEY NIGHT IN TOMPKINS (Regional Telecast)
Written by Hockey Night in Tompkins Correspondent Jesse Kalb
Tompkins Square Riots (5-3) at Mega Touch (2-6)
Location: Tompkins East, 5:30 PM
All-Time Series: First Meeting
Game Notes: Perhaps it’s time to start taking the Riots seriously. They lead the MacNeil Division (arguably the worst in the league, but still), and while they are technically a new team, the roster is loaded with BTSH vets. And what exactly is Riots captain Amy Jones toting around in that wheelie suitcase every week? HGH? Whizzinators? Whatever it is, it’s working.  Also loaded with BTSH vets, but sputtering with a 2-6 record and a minus-6 goal differential, we have Mega Touch. They’re not the North Korean soccer team of BTSH (I’m looking at you, Mathematics), but Cameroon or Honduras seems about right.
Vegas Line: Riots by 2.5
Jesse the Greek says: Give the points. Riots will be all over this one.
Watchability: 2 coach class boarding passes. This one will be over by halftime.

Survivor Pool

Adriano Bratta (WTP) – Happy Little Elves
Ben Chadwick (HLE) – Gouging Anklebiters