Tag Archive for 'ug'

Week 15 Preview

Published
by
eli
on September 11, 2008
in Weekly Previews
. 1 Comment

Now (S)crappy Free! (Except That)

GAME OF THE WEEK
Unicorns (8-6) vs. Mighty Squirrels (7-3-3)
Location: Corlears South, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: Unicorns lead 4-1
Game Notes: Although both of these teams now hover in the upper half of the standings, this game has implications far beyond simple wins and losses in BTSH.  In addition to the pressure of ending a three game losing streak, Mighty Squirrels captain Rachel “A-Korn” Greene must face one of her fiercest and most devious rivals in this game: Unicorns goalie, Craig “Ug” LaCombe.  A known cheater, LaCombe has already been caught several times this season for various league infractions.  In May, referee Adam “Legend Killer” Rubens measured his pads and determined that they were several inches above the league standard.  In June, referee Bryan “Stork” Welch found a bucket of white paint on LaCombe’s person, as he was trying to expand the crease.  Interestingly, due to excessive lobbying by Unicorns captain Christian, LaCombe is yet to face any consequences for these actions.  Greene, however, is also known to be quite crafty as she once “inadvertently” gave LaCombe the wrong start time for one of his games.  Odds are, she’ll do that again this week.  Of course, the anticipation for this heated rivalry may be moot in the end, as Greene may head to the Meadowlands for the Jets’ home opener anyway.
Keys To The Game:
1. Chris, Nelson, and Mark have combined for 31 of the Unicorns’ 47 goals this season.  Stopping this triumvirate of scorers will be imperative for the Squirrels.
2. Lost among the Greene-LaCombe hype is the revenge factor that will also motivate former Unicorn Jesse Kalb.
3. Good news for the Squirrels!  According to New York fashion week, Earth tones are back in this season.  So, they have that going for them…
Eli’s Pick: Mighty Squirrels. Rachel does it for Brett Favre.
Derek’s Pick: Unicorns. Ug will be amped for this game and will help procure another rivalry trophy to go alongside the Unicorns’ (imaginary) Fairy Tale Cup.

Continue reading ‘Week 15 Preview’

Week 10 Preview

Published
by
eli
on June 26, 2008
in Weekly Previews
. 1 Comment

The Unicorns Are Limbering Up For Their Big Game

Ug

GAME OF THE WEEK
Dark Rainbows (7-2) vs. Unicorns (4-5)
Location: Moffo, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Dark Rainbows lead 4-2
Game Notes: This game represents the second leg in the battle for the prestigious Fairy Tale Cup.  In the first leg, the Dark Rainbows soundly defeated the Happy Little Elves 4-0.  Thus, with the Rainbows currently in possession of the (imaginary) trophy, they only need a tie to keep it.  However, this will be no easy task, as the Rainbows’ star goalie, Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell is still sidelined with a shoulder injury.  In addition, the Unicorns are coming off of one of their best efforts of the season, a 6-1 defeat of the Bad Touch.  Although the Unicorns are hovering around a .500 record, a win over the defending league champions could prove that they are for real.
Keys to the Game:
1. The Dark Rainbows have used two different backup goalies thus far: Sean Reynolds and John Nielsen.  Depending on whom they choose, they will lose either one of the league’s top defenders in Reynolds or top scorers in Nielsen.
2. Although the Unicorns boast an extremely balanced scoring attack, Nelson currently leads the team with six goals, which includes a hat trick last week.
3. An unconfirmed source is reporting that Unicorns goalie Craig “Ug” LaCombe’s herpes has flared up again.  Whether this clears up by Sunday’s game and how much it will affect his play remain to be seen.
Eli’s Pick: Dark Rainbows.  The cup stays with them for another year.
Derek’s Pick: Unicorns.  Another week without White Jesus is too much for the Rainbows to overcome.

Continue reading ‘Week 10 Preview’