Tag Archive for 'Cobra Kai'

Week 18 News and Notes

Monica Is Actually Unconscious

The women’s tournament will take place on Saturday, October 1 (rain date 10/8) at Tompkins Square Park, beginning at 10 AM. It costs $20 to play with all proceeds going to GGE – Girls for Gender Equity, a non-profit group that is committed to improving the physical, psychological, social and economic development of girls and women. There is a two-game guarantee with the top two teams playing in a playoff final. During breaks in the action, there will once again be an auction to throw pies in the faces of some of BTSH’s most visible characters. Tournament organizer Dana Kravis submitted the following promotional material regarding the event:

The rivalry is heating up between the captains of this year’s women’s charity street hockey tournament. Although Kami Moore tried to keep the peace, she actually ended up adding fuel to the fire by naming her team “Irene.” Meredith Danberg-Ficarelli, captain of team “Jonathan Taylor Thomas,” noted, “It’s just in really bad taste.  My parents’ lawn chair got knocked over by that storm, and I know a girl who lost a potted basil plant from her back deck in Brooklyn… just… gone.” Amy Jones, captain of team “Buffy Summers,” was insulted by Monica Russo’s choice of team name, “Rayanne Graff.” Says Jones, “I was Rayanne Graff, OK? The producers of My So Called Life totally based that character on my high school exploits, and did I ever see a dime of those royalties? No. I told Monica all of this at Ace Bar last week, and then she goes and names her team that.  BTSH rule number one, Monica. Rule number one!” Monica Russo claims to have no memory of that conversation at Ace Bar and was not available for comment after being noogied into submission by Danberg-Ficarelli. “That chick is jacked,” she was heard muttering after the noogying.

The one thing all four ladies agreed on was that every girl in the league should immediately register for the women’s tournament here:

http://nycwomensballhockey.myevent.com/

Continue reading ‘Week 18 News and Notes’

Week 6 Preview

Nick Will Use His Intelligence To Beat Cobra Kai

GAME OF THE WEEK
Cobra Kai (3-1-1) at Fresh Kills (4-1)
Location: Tompkins West, 4:30 PM
All-Time Series: Fresh Kills leads 7-1-1
Game Notes: Former division rivals renew acquaintances in this inter-conference battle.  After suffering their first loss of the season, Cobra Kai responded last weekend with 6-1 thumping of the Tompkins Square Riots.  Rookie linemates Sarab Lalri and Marc Beland combined for three of the goals.  The duo has ignited the Dojo’s offense this season with seven of the team’s 12 goals.  Fresh Kills also had a big win last weekend, as the team shutout the previously undefeated Corlears Hookers 2-0.  The victory marked the team’s third win in a row and once again proved that captain Dave Sokolyansky and company belong in the Weyersberg Conference.  In fact, despite the team’s promotion, Fresh Kills still boasts the second best offense in BTSH with 17 goals.  However, this week may pose the stiffest test yet, as the offense will attempt to penetrate Cobra Kai’s second-ranked defense.
Keys To The Game:
1. Similar to years past, Fresh Kills sports one of the most balanced scoring attacks in the league.  Eight different players have tallied at least one goal this season, with five of them scoring multiple times.
2. Goaltender Peter Lang and the Cobra Kai defense have surrendered just six goals in five games, good for second in the league.  With the offense finally finding its groove last week against the Riots, the Dojo could be a legitimate dual threat going forward.
3. Last season, these teams split two fairly spirited contests, each winning 5-2.  This will be their only regular season matchup of 2011, and both teams would like to win the rubber match.
Eli’s Pick: Fresh Kills.  They did beat Cobra Kai for the Donohue Division title last year.
Derek’s Pick: Fresh Kills.  Experience triumphs over youth.
Watchability: 4 Sladeks.  This will be a classic matchup of old school versus new school BTSH.
Continue reading ‘Week 6 Preview’

Week 3 Box Scores

Let’s Go Rangers!

Cobra Kai 2, Mathematics 0
Cobra Kai: Marc Beland (2), Sarab Lalri (1)
Shutout: Peter Lang (1)
Goalie Win: Peter Lang

Dark Rainbows 3, Rehabs 1
Dark Rainbows: Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell (3), Jesse Gerstein (2), Josh Wilson (1)
Rehabs: Mike “Cupcake” Bartlett (1)
Goalie Win: John Meyer

Tompkins Square Riots 5, Mega Touch 1
Tompkins Square Riots: Joe Fiore 2 (3), Daniel Burns (1), Caroline Samponaro (1), Craig Thompson (1)
Mega Touch: Eric Devlin (2)
Goalie Win: Dave Gil de Rubio

Corlears Hookers 2, Butchers 0
Corlears Hookers: Matt Zimmerman 2 (5)
Shutout: Dustin “Fake Dutch’s Brother” Olson (1)
Goalie Win: Dustin “Fake Dutch’s Brother” Olson

What The Puck 5, Happy Little Elves 4 (OT-SO)
What The Puck: Darrell “Accurate Bob” Hartman 2 (2), Alex Doucette (2), Tom MacDonald (1)
Happy Little Elves: Ryan Nakahara 2 (2), Gil Valdes (3), Garrett “Ax” Carrino (2)
Shootout: What The Puck wins 2-1.  Successful attempts by Mike “The X-Factor” Woodsworth (WTP), Alex Doucette (WTP), and Gil Valdes (HLE).
Goalie Win: Anthony Romeo
Game Notes: Carrino scored the tying goal with one minute remaining in regulation.

Sky Fighters 4, Gut Rot 1
Sky Fighters: Dan Hopper 2 (3), Martin “Ocho Cinco” Cejka (2), Robert Kucera (2)
Gut Rot: Tom (1)
Goalie Win: James Stein

Fresh Kills 6, Gouging Anklebiters 2
Fresh Kills: Ariel Imas 2 (2), Justin “The Boss” Ross (3), Mike Sokolyansky (1), Nick Hobbs (1), Matt Kazior (1)
Gouging Anklebiters: Charles DeFranco 2 (2)
Goalie Win: Patrick Barch

Poutine Machine 1, Denim Demons 0
Poutine Machine: Kevin MacDonald (1)
Shutout: Tim Brown (1)
Game Notes: MacDonald scored the game-winning goal with three minutes remaining in regulation.
Goalie Win: Tim Brown

LBS, Inc. 3, Filthy Gorgeous 1
LBS, Inc.: Lawrence Goldstein (3), Karsten Pichon (2), Sam Anthony (1)
Filthy Gorgeous: Suvin “The Guru” Malik (1)
Goalie Win: Seth Wachtell

Unicorns 1, La Famiglia 0 (OT)
Unicorns: Chris (2)
Shutout: Craig “Ug” LaCombe (2)
Goalie Win: Craig “Ug” LaCombe

Week 3 Preview

Everyone Loves The Whale!

GAME OF THE WEEK
Cobra Kai (1-0-1) at Mathematics (1-0-1)
Location: Tompkins West, 4:30 PM
All-Time Series: Mathematics lead 6-2
Game Notes: The once intense rivalry between Cobra Kai and the Mathematics has lost most of its luster over the past few seasons. With heavy turnover on both squads and the two teams sent packing to different divisions, their lone battle last season (a 4-3 OT win by the Dojo) seemed more like a formality of the schedule than a legitimate grudge match. However, with Cobra Kai and the Mathematics each making a strong push in the first couple of weeks of 2011, this feud may be ready for a resurrection. Although Cobra Kai could only muster a 1-1 tie against their Donohue Division foe, La Famiglia, on Opening Day, the team stunned the Rehabs 2-1 last week. Perhaps most notable about these two wins is the team’s vast improvement in defense in holding both opponents to just a goal. Last year, the team surrendered 56 goals during the regular season, which was third most in BTSH. The Mathematics also opened the season with a dissatisfying draw, 1-1 against Poutine Machine. However, like the Dojo, Math rebounded in Week 2 with an impressive 4-1 win against the Butchers. As Cobra Kai and the Mathematics both look to stay undefeated, which team will continue its upward trend, and which will come crashing back to Earth?
Keys To The Game:
1. Cobra Kai goalie Peter Lang has allowed one goal in each of his team’s first two games.  However, the offense has only scored three goals.  Until the offense steps up, Lang will need to maintain his stellar play.
2. The Mathematics’ injury-waiting-to-happen Bradley Schmidt has scored three goals in the team’s first two games, all in the second half.  The team will once again rely on a clutch performance from him late in the game.
3. The anonymous Mathematics general manager has already warned the team to keep an eye out for Cobra Kai’s resident pie expert, Anita Khar.  He stated in an e-mail to the team, “Anita can be a very dangerous scorer, so we have to keep her covered at all times.  Of course, I’m much better than she is at ‘skeet ball.’”
Watchability: 4 Smiths.  Rich Glanzer is very happy about this rating scale.

Continue reading ‘Week 3 Preview’

Season Preview: Cobra Kai

Strike Hard, Strike First!

Color: Camouflage/White
Year Founded: 2006
2010 Regular Season Finish: 8-8 (3rd, Donohue Division; 12th overall)
2010 Playoff Result: Lost to Corlears Hookers in round of 16
Conference: Schumacher
Division: Donohue
2010 Leading Scorer: Mark Talercio, 9 goals
Team Song: Bananarama – Cruel Summer
Key Additions: Anita Khar (Rehabs), Chris “Big Sexy” Shumaker (Sky Fighters)
Key Losses: Ara “6-1-9!” Arnn

Continue reading ‘Season Preview: Cobra Kai’