If the playoffs started today… Part 1
So if the playoffs started today…what would happen? Besides everyone being pissed at me for Tim Brown starting the playoffs randomly on a Tuesday, with me having nothing to do with it, here would be the matchups. In the Round of Hockey Teams that aren’t very Good
Elves at WTP
Mega at Karma
Rainbows at Gut Rot
Poutine at Riots
Now I can’t possibly give my opinion because the Elves would win the championship and you would all wrestling hate me. So I asked the beautiful Mia to give me her winners.
The one rule was she had to pick the winners based on hockey. She said, “I’m gonna answer based on fashion. But, I’d love if you could explain by showing this paper plate award Haanwa made me regarding our weekly indoor hockey team. Basically, the paper plate award gives me the accreditation to make such predictions.”
Elves at WTP
WTP just barely edges out the Elves because their yellowish orange hue is slightly less likely to appear in toxic waste.
(Ed note: We seriously never beat WTP ever. This is ALL Chadwick’s fault as usual!)
Mega at Karma
Mega comes out strong with this year’s bold new color choice and award winning, presumably Alex EM graphics; however, Karma’s shirt is so divine, they deserve to win the whole damn thing! (Not to mention the various cuts since Lisa H only does tanks.)
Rainbows at Gut Rot
Gut Rot’s shirts were hand screen printed by Scott K. This willingness to go the extra mile gives Gut Rot the win.
Poutine at Riots
The Riots old shirts were marsala, otherwise known as THE COLOR OF 2015 by all trend forecasters. Because they added a white shirt instead of demanding to stick with this winning shade and make everyone work around them, Poutine is victorious.
Round of 16
Mia had to iron her vintage 2007 Pork Fried Rice shirt so we now hand it over to Newman! Hello Newman!
Glanzers take: Can that baby score?? Ehhhh with Scott and his cheering section they don’t need another scorer.
Glanzers take: Craig!!!! Dammit, thought you had your chance here.
Glanzers take: Is that a good thing?
Newman: It is if their teammates do the right thing have two guys cherry picking every time Roman in bounds. Which they should do.
Tomorrow, (or later today) my fellow Bash Brother finishes off the round of 16!
Fresh Kills | 13 | 0 | 1 | 27 | 61 | 25 | 36 | 4-0-1 | W12 | |
Filthier | 11 | 1 | 2 | 24 | 57 | 25 | 32 | 2/1/2002 | W4 | |
Mathematics | 10 | 4 | 0 | 20 | 52 | 36 | 16 | 6/1/2000 | W1 | |
Rehabs | 9 | 3 | 2 | 20 | 35 | 24 | 11 | 4/1/2001 | W3 | |
LBS, Inc. | 9 | 4 | 1 | 19 | 50 | 32 | 18 | 2/3/2000 | W1 | |
Gouging Anklebiters | 8 | 5 | 1 | 17 | 31 | 39 | -8 | 4-0-1 | W4 | |
Butchers | 8 | 5 | 1 | 17 | 44 | 40 | 4 | 4/2/2000 | L1 | |
Gremlins | 8 | 5 | 1 | 17 | 50 | 34 | 16 | 5/1/2001 | L2 | |
Sky Fighters | 7 | 5 | 2 | 16 | 40 | 33 | 7 | 2/1/2002 | W1 | |
Corlears Hookers | 7 | 6 | 1 | 15 | 44 | 37 | 7 | 3/2/2000 | L3 | |
Denim Demons | 6 | 7 | 1 | 13 | 33 | 35 | -2 | 2/4/2000 | W3 | |
Cobra Kai | 6 | 7 | 1 | 13 | 37 | 44 | -7 | 3/4/2000 | OT1 | |
What The Puck | 6 | 8 | 0 | 12 | 33 | 47 | -14 | 2/4/2000 | L1 | |
Instant Karma | 5 | 8 | 1 | 11 | 39 | 50 | -11 | 2/3/2000 | OT1 | |
Gut Rot | 5 | 8 | 1 | 11 | 22 | 36 | -14 | 1/4/2000 | L1 | |
Tompkins Square Riots | 4 | 7 | 3 | 11 | 25 | 48 | -23 | 3/2/2002 | L1 | |
Poutine Machine | 5 | 9 | 0 | 10 | 36 | 46 | -10 | 3/4/2000 | W3 | |
Dark Rainbows | 5 | 9 | 0 | 10 | 21 | 34 | -13 | 4/2/2000 | L3 | |
Mega Touch | 5 | 9 | 0 | 10 | 27 | 50 | -23 | 3/4/2000 | W2 | |
Happy Little Elves | 3 | 10 | 1 | 7 | 34 | 56 | -22 | 5/1/2000 | L2 | |