¿Dónde Está Mi Zapato?
Mexican Standoff Finally Lets Loose
As a dry practice run for the upcoming courtside party on June 1 (which Jefferson Hendricks is really working hard on), Mexican Standoff threw an open Cinco De Mayo Party on Sunday. Festivities included a “Mustache vs. Non-Mustache” intra-team scrimmage, a chips and salsa station, and a piñata. The action climaxed when Mexican Standoff finally broke open the piñata, splattering candy across the court. However, Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell materialized in the nick of time to save the candy from reaching any playing areas. Although the party was a smashing success, there was one casualty: Hendricks’s sneaker. With one half of his playing footwear dangling precariously from a tree, he was forced to play his game with one sneaker and one boot. Since Hendricks scored a goal, maybe he should consider playing this way more often.
Continue reading ‘Week 4 News and Notes’
The Anklebiters are Busting Out
Phil’s Too Sexy For His Shirt
For the second consecutive season, the Gouging Anklebiters unveiled new team jerseys. Zach “Cryme Tyme” Weiner, who considers himself the glue of this team, designed the illustration on the front of the shirt. Unfortunately, unlike last year, the Anklebiters are no longer “Black for Street Hockey”. That designation now falls solely on the shoulders of Sharif “The Chocolate Buzzsaw” Corinaldi and Donald Brashear. A few new t-shirts are being special ordered for Phil “Sandy” Donohue, who is far too ripped for any of the current ones.
Continue reading ‘Week 3 News and Notes’
Trenton Makes, Rachel Takes
New Jersey’s Exports: Precious Metals, Industrial Machinery, and Tommy Mayoros
After struggling with the goaltending tandem of Rob Gorden and Tim “(S)crappy” Gray last season, the Mighty Squirrels seem to be a different team this year. With new goalie Tommy Mayoros in the net, they’ve been walking with a new found swagger…some might even say an air of confidence. They are now 1-0-1 after facing two tough teams. Captain Rachel Greene was sure to note, “People often ask us where we got our awesome goalie from, and the answer is simple. We got him from New Jersey.” New Jersey was offered Scrappy in exchange, but it politely declined.
Continue reading ‘Week 2 News and Notes’
Amy Lott Is Very Impressed With Amy Lott
Sky Fighters Missed the Memo: Children Should Make the Shirts, Not Design Them
Mexican Standoff, Unicorns, and Dark Rainbows all unveiled new uniforms on Sunday, while the Sky Fighters plan to inaugurate their “lovely” new jerseys (as modeled by Amy Lott above) this Sunday. In an attempt to be more like the Mighty Squirrels (”Please!”), the Gouging Anklebiters sported new track jackets. There is no word yet on whether they plan to add aging former goalies with back issues to their roster.
Continue reading ‘Week 1 News and Notes’
Good night, sweet prince.
Aaron ”Coach” Pagdon of Denim Demons submits the following poem regarding his team’s ”loss” of Ellery “The Nature Boy” Gillette:
An ignominious end to an otherwise glorious career.
The Demons have lost their Claude Lapointe……their Richard Park…..
Mexican Standoff?
I tell you, when I retire, it will be with a contender…..oh, wait…that’s us this year….
Do not go gently into that good night, Ellery.
And if ever we meet again on asphalt….I won’t hesitate to play the body.
Good night, sweet prince.
![Cinco De Mayo](http://www.btsh.org/bruise/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/standoff.jpg")