A Little Something for the Ladies…
”I just got back from the tanning salon.”
Monthly Archive for May, 2008
¿Dónde Está Mi Zapato?
![Cinco De Mayo](http://www.btsh.org/bruise/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/standoff.jpg")
Mexican Standoff Finally Lets Loose
As a dry practice run for the upcoming courtside party on June 1 (which Jefferson Hendricks is really working hard on), Mexican Standoff threw an open Cinco De Mayo Party on Sunday. Festivities included a “Mustache vs. Non-Mustache” intra-team scrimmage, a chips and salsa station, and a piñata. The action climaxed when Mexican Standoff finally broke open the piñata, splattering candy across the court. However, Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell materialized in the nick of time to save the candy from reaching any playing areas. Although the party was a smashing success, there was one casualty: Hendricks’s sneaker. With one half of his playing footwear dangling precariously from a tree, he was forced to play his game with one sneaker and one boot. Since Hendricks scored a goal, maybe he should consider playing this way more often.
This is What Happens When Chongo Misses a Week
What The Puck 3, Corlears Hookers 2
What The Puck: Tom MacDonald 2, Jen Hale
Corlears Hookers: Brendan “Dutch” Kearney 2
Mighty Squirrels 1, Happy Little Elves 1 (OT-SO)
Mighty Squirrels: Arthur “Lil’ Weezy” Revechkis
Happy Little Elves: Jonathan “The Barnacle” Levine
Unicorns 4, LBS 1
Unicorns: Mark (Boner), Christian, Aaron, Davey
LBS: Karsten Pichon
Rehabs 2, Fresh Kills 1
Rehabs: Kami Moore, Sal Malguarnera
Fresh Kills: Dave Sokolyansky
Denim Demons 2, Cobra Kai 2 (OT-SO)
Denim Demons: Dave Shyu, Zack Tinkleman, Mike Pereira (SO)
Cobra Kai: Adriano Bratta, Greg “Lysol” Altman, Adriano Bratta (SO)
Filthy Gorgeous 3, Sky Fighters 2
Filthy Gorgeous: Joseph Pereira 2, James Pereira
Sky Fighters: Martin Cejka, Robert Kucera
Dark Rainbows 4, Gouging Anklebiters 2
Dark Rainbows: Lindsey Foehrenbach, Brad Thomason, P.T. Walkley, Josh Wilson
Gouging Anklebiters: Caroline Morrissey-Bickerton, Phil “Sandy” Donohue
Tuques 3, Mathematics 0
Tuques: Bill Monahan, Peter Wilson, Scott Sampson
Shutout: Minkus
Mexican Standoff 2, Bad Touch 2 (OT-SO)
Mexican Standoff: Jefferson Hendricks, Jason “The Hamburglar” Rosenstock, Len Guinto (SO)
Bad Touch: Eric Devlin 2, Eric Devlin (SO)
Go To Bread
GAME OF THE WEEK
What The Puck (3-0) vs. Corlears Hookers (3-0)
Location: Corlears North, 5:00 PM
All-Time Series: Corlears Hookers lead 2-0
Game Notes: This game features a classic matchup of high-octane offense versus rock-solid defense. What The Puck currently boasts the most goals in the league with an average of six per game. Three of BTSH’s top six goal scorers wear orange, with Larry “Mad Dog” Zimmer leading the way with six, and Mike “The X-Factor” Woodsworth and Tom MacDonald each chipping in four. The Corlears Hookers pride themselves in their impenetrable defense, allowing just one goal through three games. Goalie Chris Beauvois leads the league with two shutouts. These teams last met in the 2007 semi-finals, when the Corlears Hookers ended What The Puck’s hopes for a second consecutive championship with a shootout victory. What The Puck will be looking to even the score.
Keys to the Game:
1. Darrell “Accurate Bob” Hartman is a key cog in What The Puck’s well-oiled machine, but has missed the first three games. Whether he shows for this game could go a long way in deciding the winner.
2. Despite the Corlears Hookers’ apparent focus on defense, Brendan “Dutch” Kearney and Gavin “Dutch’s Brother” Kearney are still capable of scoring a lot of goals and breaking a game wide open.
3. Roderick “Guy LeDouche” Cruz has recently started to learn the ancient art of voodoo. He was seen this week sporting an Albert “Al” Huang voodoo doll with several pins in it. Monitor Al’s performance closely.
Eli’s Pick: Corlears Hookers. Good defense stops good offense.
Derek’s Pick: What The Puck. Although their offense is leading the way this season, they also feature a solid defense anchored by grizzled veteran, Corey “Chongo” Winters.
