Squirrel Time!
“Who’s up for some turducken?”
Monthly Archive for April, 2008
The Anklebiters are Busting Out
Phil’s Too Sexy For His Shirt
For the second consecutive season, the Gouging Anklebiters unveiled new team jerseys. Zach “Cryme Tyme” Weiner, who considers himself the glue of this team, designed the illustration on the front of the shirt. Unfortunately, unlike last year, the Anklebiters are no longer “Black for Street Hockey”. That designation now falls solely on the shoulders of Sharif “The Chocolate Buzzsaw” Corinaldi and Donald Brashear. A few new t-shirts are being special ordered for Phil “Sandy” Donohue, who is far too ripped for any of the current ones.
The Rehabs Love To Come From Behind
Filthy Gorgeous 6, Fresh Kills 2
Filthy Gorgeous: Suvin “The Guru” Malik 2, Paul “Ashy Larry” Vernon, Matt Novick, James Pereira, Jonathan Rick
Fresh Kills: Jeff Lesser, Jeff Goldberg
Denim Demons 8, Mexican Standoff 0
Denim Demons: Mike Pereira 3, Lena Moy-Borgen 3, Brad Weiger 2
Shutout: Zack Tinkleman
Rehabs 4, Unicorns 2
Rehabs: Brian Wong 2, Chantel Arroyo, Jon “Dinner Plate” Feldman
Unicorns: Allison, Ryan
LBS 5, Gouging Anklebiters 3
LBS: Tom Capatosta 3, Brian “Grandmaster B” Barrett, Phil Yang
Gouging Anklebiters: Phil “Sandy” Donohue, Caroline Morrissey-Bickerton, Matt Tsiang
What The Puck 3, Cobra Kai 2
What The Puck: Ant “Father Time” Ventolieri, Mike “The X-Factor” Woodsworth, Larry “Mad Dog” Zimmer
Cobra Kai: Mariko Nakatani, Adriano Bratta
Mighty Squirrels 3, Mathematics 1
Mighty Squirrels: Gary Kowalski, Arthur “Lil’ Weezy” Revechkis, Al Sansoni
Mathematics: Laura MacNeil
Sky Fighters 4, Happy Little Elves 1
Sky Fighters: Martin Cejka 2, Dan Hopper, Sarah Larson
Happy Little Elves: Kenneth Szeto
[Editors Note: There will be more information on this game in the news and notes post]
Corlears Hookers 3, Bad Touch 0
Corlears Hookers: Brendan “Dutch” Kearney, Gavin “Dutch’s Brother” Kearney, Jock Paul
Shutout: Chris Beauvois
Dark Rainbows 6, Tuques 0
Dark Rainbows: John Nielsen 4, Jonathan Rudd, P.T. Walkley
Shutout: Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell
“Oh, puh-lease!” (With Drunken German Accent)
GAME OF THE WEEK
Mathematics (2-0) vs. Mighty Squirrels (1-0-1)
Location: Moffo, 5:00 PM
All-Time Series: Mathematics lead 4-0
Game Notes: This matchup has rapidly developed into one of the most intense rivalries in all of BTSH. Captains Rachel “A-Korn” Greene and Derek Tagliarino have made no secret of their mutual hatred of one another, as their small New Jersey-New York feud has escalated exponentially. However, Greene and Tagliarino were able to put aside their differences just long enough to wager a case of beer on the outcome of this game. The annual Squirrels-Mathematics prank war has also commenced. The Mathematics struck first by stealing Rocky, the Mighty Squirrels’ mascot. The Squirrels then retaliated by kidnapping the Mathematics’ mascot, Screech. This game promises to be a blood bath and will not be for the faint of heart.
Keys to the Game:
1. Despite generating several scoring chances last week for the Mathematics, Andy Pratt was held without a goal. He’ll be looking to change that this Sunday.
2. Goalie Sarah Coombs of Mathematics has allowed just one goal in two games, while Tommy Mayoros of the Mighty Squirrels has allowed just two. Both have promised to outperform their counterpart in this game.
3. The Mighty Squirrels’ Arthur “Lil Weezy” Revechkis has been practicing a new shot he calls the “Knuckle-Puck” all week. He plans to unveil it Sunday.
