2006 July Archive at btsh.org

*scores/typos of the week
theme: the heat, as i can think of nothing else
filthy fanned pfr, 7-3
rehabs went to see that al gore movie with wtp, 5-2
demons opened a hydrant for henry motion, 2-1
unicorns sweated kills, 2-2
tuques choked on garbage fumes from bad touch, 11-2
math smelled like mso, 9-3
rainbows heated anklebiters, 8-2
lbs thanked god they moved away from nyc and squirrels, 4-2

*week 13 faq
-i heard rumblings of a free rum and coke day. is this just bullshit? cuz it sounds like bullshit.
nay! coke zero wants your demographic (boozin semi-employed people?), so they’re coming by on the 30th with some free product, and we’ll have the rum if anyone wants to mix’n'match.

*next week
WEEK 14: 7/23/06
CORLEARS
3:00 PM Pork Fried Rice vs. The Tuques
3:00 PM Filthy Gorgeous vs. LBS
4:00 PM Rehabs vs. Mathematics
4:00 PM Gouging Anklebiters vs. Fresh Kills
5:00 PM Dark Rainbows vs. Mighty Squirrels
5:00 PM Unicorns vs. Henry Motion
MOFFO
3:30 PM Bad Touch vs. What The Puck
4:30 PM Denim Demons vs. Mexican Standoff

*found footwear
from lindsey unis:
john mark and i (uni’s) picked up a pair of left behind white new balance and shin guards after the game yesterday - i didn’t look to closely at them to even tell if they were guys or girls shoes. anyhow, they were next to the south court. we’ve got ‘em and will bring them next game if someone claims them.
he/she can email me - woolmitten at hotmail dot com

*kudos/gasface
kudos:
-partying like it’s 1999
which, if you’re as old as i am, was college. godspeed to seth, molly, phil and brent for the chug-a-lug on sunday. now let’s all sign up for credit cards and wear our pjs to class!

and that’s all i got! way to keep it posi, people!

gasface:
-no clever tag, just getting towed sucks.
andrea msq reports that teammate gary was thanked for his goal and cooler of beer by getting his car towed, and brother lives in new jersey someplace. but at least he was probably drunk.
-the tuques– now with 100% less goaltending!
week 2 of no net help. when i asked if tom got hit by a bus, i was reminded that that’s what happened last year. hopefully he hasn’t fallen on any subway tracks lately.
-bye bye, balls
we started the season with 50, and now we’re almost out. going for the obvious joke here, but treat the balls like they’re your own, people.

*lessy’s poetry corner
every sunday, jeff lesser of fresh kills writes me a much-appreciated wrap-up of the day’s events. i have decided, with his permission, to share the highlights with everyone as long-form poetry (which doesn’t involve having to adjust the original format one bit).

this week’s poem is entitled: a good day?

I can tell you that my impressions of today at the courts can begin and end with the HEAT.
With the wind chill-or heat chill, factor, it was a cool 150 degrees today at Corlears.
Some would say (not me in particular) that any day that PFR loses is a good day. Today would be a good day.

-jeff lesser

*listings
THIS Saturday July 22nd
1:30pm “doors”
2 > 6 show
Free admission

East River Music Project
in cooperation with NYC Parks & Recreation
presents

DRAGONS OF ZYNTH
TAIKO MASALA
HOME
JONATHAN KANE’S FEBRUARY

East River Park Amphitheatre NYC
just south of the Williamsburg Bridge on the Manhattan side
subway: F or JMZ to Essex / Delancey
an aerial view: http://tinyurl.com/95jmh

*scores/typos of the week
theme:Â bats.Â cuz there’s one in my house.Â now.
demons circled tuques, 9-4
habs hung from rainbows, 6-4
lbs deflected swats from squirrels, 2-0
biters ate bugs and gorgeous, 3-0
killers gave rabies to bad touch, 10-1
unis were blind to math, 3-2
pfr are covered in aids and mso, 13-3
wtp scared the living shit out of henry motion, 8-1

*week 12 faq
-are bats really covered in aids?
yes.Â they can also kill you by glancing at you with their blind little eyes, and a scratch from a bat talon is ten times more deadly than a bite from a recluse spider, and their teeth are made from solid ebola virus.
also i hate bats.

*next week
WEEK 13:Â 7/16/06
CORLEARS
3:00 PMÂ Â Â Pork Fried Rice vs. Filthy Gorgeous
3:00 PMÂ Â Â What The Puck vs. Rehabs
4:00 PMÂ Â Â Denim Demons vs. Henry Motion
4:00 PMÂ Â Â Fresh Kills vs. Unicorns
5:00 PMÂ Â Â The Tuques vs. Bad Touch
5:00 PMÂ Â Â Mexican Standoff vs. Mathematics
MOFFO
3:30 PMÂ Â Â Dark Rainbows vs. Gouging Anklebiters
4:30 PMÂ Â Â Mighty Squirrels vs. LBS

*kudos/gasface
kudos:
-to the anonymous soul who broke down a net without being asked.
you are so not going to hell.
-molly’s mini tv
when headbutts to the chest are that small, they’re actually kinda cute.
-johnny knoxville in the bar on sunday?
ew!Â just when you thought the johnsons ick-factor couldn’t get any higher.

gasface:
-france
to use the parlance of the interweb– clowned.

*lessy’s poetry corner
every sunday, jeff lesser of fresh kills writes me a much-appreciated wrap-up of the day’s events.Â i have decided, with his permission, to share the highlights with everyone as long-form poetry (which doesn’t involve having to adjust the original format one bit).

this week’s poem is entitled:Â in praise of the unicorns.

At the same time as our game, the Unicorns wre busy squeaking out a big victory over Mathematics.
After years of being one of the model franchises in BTSH, The Unicorns certainly look like real championship contenders in 2006.
They have a fully loaded roster, seems like they have 100 players each week.
They have skilled forwards and defenders, their female contingent is active and aggresive.
They play with tons of heart and enthusiasm.
Although the goaltender has some emotional issues, The Unicorns are going to be a team to be reckoned with in late October!

-jeff lesser

*listings
-from showtime unis:
the weekend of the btsh allstar game.Â myself and maybe 1 or more people are gonna host the 1st ever B.T.S.H VS. L.E.S.W.F (LOWER EAST SIDE WRESTLING FEDERATION).Â the match will take place after the all-star game…10 min or so for each of the 2 out of 3 matches………

SHOWTIME VS. L.E.S.W.FÂ HARDCORE CHAMPION JOHN BODY
for the l.e.s.w.f. hardcore title

the champion is flying in from florida for the event so i wanna hook him up with something.
i was thinking that people can donate money to give him for his flying in from florida.
contact LOWADECKFYNEST at YAHOO dot COM

-from a lady named emily roth:
I am Emily Roth of Piranha Productions, we are currently producing a
sports blooper show that will begin airing September this year on NBC
and other affiliates.Â We are looking for Street Hockey bloopers
and amazing hits, or just crazy stuff.Â If you have anything, write me at
efroth at gmail dot com

-from me:
Saturday July 22nd
1:30pm “doors”
2 > 6 show
Free admission

East River Music Project
in cooperation with NYC Parks & Recreation
presents

DRAGONS OF ZYNTH
TAIKO MASALA
HOME
JONATHAN KANE’S FEBRUARY

East River Park Amphitheatre NYC
just south of the Williamsburg Bridge on the Manhattan side
subway: F or JMZ to Essex / Delancey
an aerial view:Â http://tinyurl.com/95jmh